Somebody mentioned that I never actually gave a valid REASON why I fucking HATE all you alt.slack.dumb-shitz so much and that I never made it completely clear why I was so mad in the first place. I think this is a valid question, and I think that you FUCKSHITS deserve an answer. The basic reason I hate you and am pissed off at you is simple: It's that the VAST majority of you FISH-COCKED roach-fuckers wouldn't quit smackin' the fucking lizard long enough to even CONSIDER doing ANYTHING to help make alt.slack a CONSPIRACY-SMASHING success and so WHATEVER list of fucking TASKS I could come up with to CHANGE this foetid situation will probably remain FOREVER vacant due to the unflappable BE-SHITTEDNESS of you STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS on alt.slack. Jesus H. Fucking Christ on a VOOM-BROOM, you CHEESE-CUNTED shitholes couldn't find your way through a POOP LOG JAM if you had fucking GLASSES, you chinzy, asshole, fucked up, LAZY, COMPLETELY STUFFED WITH RAT SHIT, lame-ass, fucking PINKS. THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE, YOU DICKHEADS!!!! YOU'RE ALL PINK!!!!! Your FAVORITE thing to do of a Saturday Night is to cut the cocks off of GREAT DANES, stuff wires up the urethras so they have some semblance of an erection, stuff them up the bloody cunts of DEAD FUCKING CHIHUAHUAS and then EAT 'EM RAW, BALLS AND ALL, SAVING THE FORESKINS FOR YOUR FUCKED UP MOTHERS-IN-LAW. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! You think I don't know what's going on, don't you? You think I don't know SHIT! Well, I've got the fucking BREAK-BALLS on you - I know the SCAM on you SNATCH-FACE! You're going great guns shoveling TONS and OCEANS and VAST COSMIC BALANCES full of GREASY SHIT SANDWICHES into your FESTERING, LEECH BE-STRUNG MAWS, you groveling, hell-poop mongering, ASSHOLE-EATING-OUT, toe-jam injecting, botfly larvae munching, AIDs-Mosquito breeding, shit-breathing FUCKWADS! You wanna know just how much you fuckers SUCK? A LOT!!!!!!!!!!! That's how much! You suck so bad, the ETERNAL VORTEX of G'BLHEEGLFRAN explodes OUTWARD at 6,000,000,000,000 cubic yards a fucking SECOND by comparison. That means you SUCK COWSHIT while fucking a DEAD TURTLE while a donkey FUCKS YOU UP THE ASS while the WHOLE ZOO WATCHES! HAHAHAHAHAHA! YA BOO! You fucking SUCK, LIKE MAJORLY BIG TIME, you slack-cunted, pencil-dicked, hog-fucking, poop-chomping, dog-saliva-slurping, TOTALLY FUCKED, cock-sucking, mother-fucking DUMB ASSES!!! You dumb shits wouldn't know what to do to be a REAL SubGenius ANYWAY. You wouldn't have a fucking CLUE! You ruin the experience for EVERYBODY by you even fucking BEING here. You're so fucked up and lame that if you even MENTIONED, one time, IN YOUR FUCKING SLEEP, that you'd once CONSIDERED thinking about CONSIDERING being a REAL SubGenius, it would UTTERLY fuck the ENTIRE UNIVERSE up for EONS TO COME. There could NEVER be a REAL Church of the SubGenius if ANY ONE of you cocksucking, slug-fucking alt.slack.shitz even thought about joining, EVEN ONCE, you slime-betrothed, pin-worm humping, fucking VULTURE CUM SNARFING DUMB FUCKS who shit in each other's assholes and then hire your fucking MOTHERS to suck the shit out with a fucking straw and the fucking straw ITSELF is ALSO made of PURE SHIT! THAT'S why I'm fucking pissed off and hate you all so much.