What is All This??

From: jimvan@NOSPAMgate.net (Jim Vandewalker)
Date: Tue, 07 Jul 1998 19:45:48 GMT

Is some jackass talking about belief ? Do I hear a magpie use the word
faith ? Does some moron say that the SubGenius faith was not borne out by
events ? Is some chattering catechumen complaining that all the Church's
dogma turned out to be wrong ? Are some dimwits looking for triple their
money back, because the saucers didn't come?[1] Is there a complaint that
the only thing left of the Church seems to be the urge of the hierarchy to
sell out?

Well all I can say is you must not have been paying attention. SubGenius is
not a faith. "Bob" has always said he doesn't care what you believe.

You go to those other faith-based religions and they ask for your
insubstantial belief and you get insubstantial salvation. In the
Industrial Church of the SubGenius belief is irrelevant. All "Bob" wants
is your money. You get to do the thinking for yourself. Or did you miss
that part in the books where it says SubGenii make up their own dogma?
Guess what, Bunkie? That means if you just believe what it says in the
books you missed the point.

So the saucers didn't come? The saucers weren't the right answer. THERE IS

[1] As has already been pointed out elsewhere, the money-back guarantee is
for ETERNAL SALVATION, not a saucer-ride. So as the feller says, first
wait until the end of eternity, then check as to whether or not you were
saved and if not, write in for your refund. NOW DO YOU GET IT? Did you
THINK about it?


Jim the Prophet
Licensed SubGenius Preacher

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