Lawsuit UPDATE

From: <>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Lawsuit UPDATE
Date: Tue, 7 Jul 1998 19:28:05 -0500

Well, the investigators finally caught up with Bob. That pathetic,
pipe-faced weasel was hiding in a dumpster. Rats ate half his ass off.

Bad news for the Subgeniuses, though. Bob outsmarted everyone. He's now on
the plaintiff's side. That's right, as the leader of the Subgenius
religion, he EXCOMMUNICATED himself and made the date of excommunication
effective before the church was actually started. Since he was therefore
never officially a member, we have no basis for a lawsuit against him.

But wait. It gets worse. Bob produced a card and receipt showing that HE
sent in his $30 and is therefore entitled to get in on the lawsuit. Since
the only folks left who are accountable were actually ministers in the
church when the promises were being made, those are the people who are being
sued. Bob is suing every member of the church of the Subgenius for fraud.
The legal team, inspired by this brilliant move, has made him their leader.
For all those who paid Bob $30, prepare to now pay him TRIPLE his money back
because you failed to deliver on his promise.

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