subgenius 6/7/98 editted

6/7/98 X-Day ideas

AKABondage: 'what good will t-shirts be on the escape vessels?'
Booger: yeah but when the mansons get pissed off, look out
Friday-J: Praise the Lord's skinny ass
Friday-J: AKABondage - I want my meat shell to be properly packaged when I leave it behind.
AKABondage: friday - any preferred method?
Stang: Bondage -- many of us are trying to finish up a lot of otherwise unfinished business before we leave earth, even though, technically, we can always return to whatever's left.
AKABondage: friday - oh, then thats not my department, I only do Saranwrap, rope, bodybags, plastercast, chains...
Booger: stang: have you ever seen the "exposing the subgenius cult" website?
Friday-J: It pleases me to do business one last time in "Bob"'s name
RevDick: hot rats
Stang: For instance, I am trying to make the website all MAJORLY spiffed up before we leave. Also I have to get a lot of legal matters in order for disposition of my property, etc., among dumb-ass relatives that didn't join the Church and might need my gear and home in the End Times, if they live.
P-Lil: Pallette-wrapped cult prepares for the End Of The World.
Friday-J: AKAB - Someone else will assuredly want your services, even if it's just for her husband
Booger: the guy claims that he is an ex-subgenius who thinks that come x-day subgenii will be commiting suicide all over the world
Nully: Stang: your kids were never ordained, were they?
MegaLiz: Ooo THat's STrange
AKABondage: well give Someoneelse my email address then..
Friday-J: Stang - Just sign the Final Will. BTW, if you put all the text in 5-point you CAN fit the entire will on one page - and the TINY TEXT is SCARY.
P-Lil: Nully: We paid for their memberships at the Drill last year. They're saved.
Stang: Booger -- I am extremely familiar with that website! I have talked to the Expose Bob guy many times lately on the radio.
Nully: How come nobody ever saved MY kids?
Friday-J: I officialy endorse Me as the official Self of My Reality
P-Lil: Nully: Which kids?
Rabbi: Well, at least you know I got home in one piece, honey.
P-Lil: Nully: Those pumpkins you've been growing don't count.
Booger: Stang: he's kidding, right? i couldnt tell weather or not he was kidding
Friday-J: Expose "Bob" Before He Exposes Himself To YOUR CHILDREN!
Stang: Shit, I still haven't done my "FAREWELL VIDEO!" Been thinking about it though. I wish I had a copy of Do's complete video will.
ChrisLee: I also officially endorse Friday as whatever she thinks she is.
Stang: Long Live the New Flesh.
E_Strange: Booger...No No No...come X-Day SubGenii all around the world will be commiting HOMOSIDE
Nully: Stang: I wonder if those are available anywhere
E_Strange: were going to butt-fuck ouselves to death
Friday-J: Kill! Kill! Kill for the love of killing! Kill! Kill! Kill for the love of Connie!
Stang: Strange, speak for yourself.
Booger: and that's a bad thing?
Friday-J: Stang - May I assist your suicide?
E_Strange: you sure are a purdy man Rev. Stang
Friday-J ties on the big red straps
Friday-J: "FOR CONNIE ..."
Stang: "SUICIDE", SHEEEE-it. Sure, it might LOOK like a field full of burning monks, screaming.
Friday-J: Kill! Kill!
Friday-J: Screaming with the JOY of SHUCKING our MEAT in PUBLIC, right in the FACE of the Conspiracy, for ONE LAST TIME!
P-Lil sets up the video cameras to tape the death and cryogenic preservation of Stang's Foot Gland
E_Strange:'re purrrrfect for me seeing how you have one nut and I'm only half a fag
Stang: But seriously. Think of all the shit that some people have to finish up before X-Day. Like maxxing out the credit cards... but also, trying to convert the unsaved friends and relatives one last time.
Rabbi: Kill for Connie? Can't we just fuck for Connie instead?
Friday-J: Strange - Top or bottom half?
MegaLiz: Fuck the unsaved! I'm TOO BUSY!
Friday-J: Kill for the LOVE of Connie!
E_Strange: Friday...the business end girl...the business end
Rabbi: Friday-Why, did you want to split him with someone?
st-bubba: id rather max out THEIR credit cards rather than save the buggers from a horrible death...just in case...
Friday-J: Strange - The end that has your credit cards in it?
P-Lil: I've completed my X-Day shopping early. Well, except for THOSE three Church memberships I promised. Heh heh.
Stang: I guess as 7 am July 5 approaches, we should work with the band to gradually work the crowd up into a frenzy, with a countdown with monstrous huge drumbeats.
Friday-J: Rabbi - No, Strange says he's half gay and I wanted to know which half
E_Strange: Friday...I got the new bar code tatoo
RevDick: get a two-skinned foreskin drum stang
Friday-J: Stang - You need a BIG digital clock!
Stang: Also. Think of your pets. Some of you may want to beam them up... I however plan to just shoot my two dogs Beast and Puddin just before I leave for NY.
Friday-J: Stang - Bringing the snouts along for one last romp?
Friday-J: Can we finally EAT Puddin'?
MegaLiz: I don't love my pets enough to shoot them
E_Strange: Friday..the half that throbs for Stangs sweet loving
st-bubba: why the hell do the xists have to come so damn early in the morning anyhow?? i mean, theyve had untold millenia to plan this, right?? but they STILL want to interrupt morning coffee...
Stang: I also have to finish a "HA, HA, YOU FUCKED UP" mailing and website for the suckers who thought they'd WISELY save that $30.
Friday-J: Strange - Make sure you rinse out your mouth with honey because Stang can be one bitter pill to "swallow"!
P-Lil: Friday: I wish you wouldn't remind me of that fact.
MegaLiz: I heard he sticks in your throat like ANOTHER throat
P-Lil: Gack. *wipes tongue reflexively*
Stang: Ahem. Excuse me. I don't think you people take this seriously. It's only what, 28 days now?
*** P-Lil has set the topic on channel #subgenius to Muerte del planeto
Friday-J: I woke up in the middle of the night thinking that a hairless weasel was running around in the bed - BUT THAT WEREN'T NO WEASEL!
E_Strange: Friday..I thought I'd let Stang swallow this time. His ulcer healed by now I hope?
P-Lil: Twenty-seven.
Friday-J: Strange - Fist him first and check.
Booger: no, day before x-day i'm slipping into a nicley blaced worm hole
Friday-J: "QUIJIBO IS A GREAT READ" says someone
E_Strange: PANTS WEASELS!!!!
Stang: You guys are, like, grossing me out, man.
st-bubba: stang: if we took it seriously, i reckon our slack would be imperiled, non? i mean, hell, if we take the end of the world and extinction of the species seriously, we'd miss all the FUN inherent in the carnage!
Friday-J pets the weasel
MegaLiz: friendly weasel frenzy
E_Strange: Stang...ever let a REAL MAN clam down your throat?
Rabbi: Friday- I'd be a little wary about petting THOSE kinds of weasels.
Friday-J: Bubba - Save whatever species you like. It's up to YOU to buy that koala bear a membership card!
Stang: St. Bubba -- it's true that most old-Earth things won't MATTER after the Day. But... I dunno, I'm real sentimental about old Ma Earth.
P-Lil: Stang: I take it seriously enough to bring extra bludgeons, just in case.
Friday-J: Strange - Can I see your "man clam"?
Friday-J adjusts one of the red straps
Stang: My mom and dad, and kids, and several aunts and uncles are Saved, but my brother and sister are NOT, nor most of my in-laws. They're gonna FRY. And my dogs...
MegaLiz: Maybe there's time for the dogs to get a JOB?
E_Strange: Friday...sure. All you need is a ticket to the X-Day Homo clam bake
AKABondage: stang - are they nice and meaty or are they too stringy and flavorless?
Friday-J: Stang - Sweet Sivet's posterior planted in my lap makes up for a LOT of dead relatives.
*** P-Lil has set the topic on channel #subgenius to Muerte del Yacatisma Satanos
Stang: *SNIFF* -- it's just sad, thinking how all those nice people will be tortured and starved, at BEST...
Friday-J: Strange - Let me guess, I bet it's scheduled right against the Thursday night shindig, right?
st-bubba: stang: bring lots of pictures...bring a pot of soil to copulate with every once in awhile, but DONT BACK OUT NOW DAMN YOU!! i paid good money to have my soul raped without worrying about sentimentality in the 12th hour affecting all my plans for mayhem.
P-Lil: Stang: Here, take this suppository. It'll make you forget those "people" things.
Friday-J lubes Stang
E_Strange: sure are a purty man
Friday-J: I need to back up some of my computer data offsite so I can have the saucers make two passes to pick it up.
P-Lil: Stang is forgetting.
Stang: I think I'm gonna "beam up" the neighborhood that I grew up in (before one of you fucks destroys it senselessly), and populate it with robots of my classmates as they were in 1959, and my neighbors, and then I will go in there and LORD IT OVER THEM ALL in a 10 year old's body. Hell, why robots. I'll imprison the REAL PEOPLE, those still alive.... heh heh... heh heh heh
P-Lil: Stang is forgetting he is a purty man.
P-Lil: He is forgetting the dogs, the relatives....
P-Lil: DAMN, he's resisting treatment. Friday, get the syringe.
Friday-J warms the syringe between her breasts, tight against her white nurse's uniform
MegaLiz: Can I have the home ec. teacher?
Friday-J slips the needle into Stang's foot Gland and ever-so-slowly presses home the plunger
RevLurch: industrial arts
Friday-J: Vice-Principal for me
P-Lil: Now, Stang, you must relax and accept the facts of the situation. They are all going to die. Repeat after me. "They are all going to die."
MegaLiz: Gym Nazi. Yeah.
Stang: Yes... on my Escape Planet, I'll recreate life as it was BEFORE I WENT TO WORK FOR DOBBS!!! Before I ever HEARD of any of this!
Booger: i want the PE instructor to torture.
Friday-J: Damn sonofabitch wouldn't punish the kids who were beating me bloody because it would WARP THEM!
Booger: i hate those motherfuckers
st-bubba: but...but...keeping the real people and not just cheap simulacarums only leads to their BREEDING! thats so ICKY
Friday-J: Stang - So - I guess they'll be no place for ME on that planet
Friday-J sobs and makes big Keene eyes ,OO,
Rabbi: How many ex-boyfriends are we allowed to torture at once? I have quite a few...
Stang: Friday, you can come be an 11 year old with me on my Escape Planet and we can "discover sex" together. ShorDur-Memory-Loss.
P-Lil monitors Stang's dream recorder
MegaLiz: You can go home again, Stang, but they won't let you in!
Friday-J: Bubba - Sterilize them. By hand.
E_Strange: Stang...take me with you...I can't live without your hot monosphericle love
Stang: I have so many god damn PE instructors to torture... SO many...
AKABondage: torturing xboyfriends? hmm..
Friday-J: Rabbi - Torture tham ALL with your new multi-body ego!
Stang: I have a whole list of dumb ass po'bucker bully redneck Baptists as long as a phone book.
P-Lil gently whacks Stang's head with a thin dowel rod
RevLurch: outa warranty
Friday-J imagines touching Stang's tiny, hairless body - waitaminute, he's STILL tiny and hairless!
E_Strange: I'm going to populate my planet with 11 year old Stangs
P-Lil: One one-thousand, two one-thousand, three one-thousand....
Friday-J: Stang - Wanna play Doctor?
Rabbi: Stang- At this point, I think I've lost Strange to you for good. Much luck and happiness to you both!
P-Lil: Hey Bunnyboy. Help us make Stang forget Earth.
Bunnyboy: Aged on the Stang.
*** Bi_Wet_Girl ( has joined channel #subgenius
MegaLiz is nostalgic for the times when people might have been mean to her if she'd been paying attention
Stang: Then, Friday, we can go back to YOUR elementary school and turn into Jack Kirby monsters and torment YOUR bullies!
AKABondage: friday - you bring the speculum?
- Stang: Then I'll fuck your MOM!
*BPIsles*- It seems that this server has hit it's client limit, at least until I fix it. It would be much appreciated for some people to switch to another FEFNet server, such as or until this problem could be resolved, Thanks.
Booger: Friday: Wanna play hide the kielbasa?
Stang: What the fuck is that robot muttering about?
Friday-J hides the kielbasa in Strange's gay half
RevLurch: let's play hide the booger
ChrisLee: what is a Bi-Wet Girl?
Bunnyboy: You WILL forget earth, you WILL what was that?
AKABondage: she goes both ways, with water, and with fire
Friday-J: Stang - Imagine those big gelatinous breasts wrapped right around your body! My mom's I mean, not MY big gelatinous breasts
P-Lil: All these powerful mind-altering substances--WASTED.
ChrisLee: was she with the Legion of Super Heroes?
Stang: This stuff about "Strange's Gay half" is really freaking me out, man.
Booger: that means she gets wet not only in her gentaial area, but her asshole as well
Friday-J: The half that PEES
MegaLiz: It's his leftover side
P-Lil: Meanwhile Stang's still going on about things that happened to him almost 40 years ago.
Rabbi: Stang- That half has been crying out to you all the way in upstate Pennsy.
AKABondage: p-lil - it's like MIB, he's gonna wake up from a coma on his escape planet
Stang: Rabbi, can't you "cure" him???
E_Strange: Stang...Hear that. The Rabbi cut me loose. Now we are free to explore the love only a haiy ape and a one nut kook could ever know
Bi_Wet_Gir: Hello
Stang: It really makes me nervous the way Strange is looking at me.
Friday-J: Hi Bi. How many penii do you have?
Bi_Wet_Gir: none
Stang: I never should have kidded him about that homo stuff.
Rabbi: Some things need a special ministering touch, my friend.
Booger: ....and i am that one nut cook
Friday-J looks at Stang looking at Strange looking at Stang
Friday-J: Bi - Join us at the Church of the SubGenius and you can grow MANY PENII!
P-Lil: I'm not liking the way the graphs are reading. He's showing a lot of anxiety over male erotic expression at the moment--look at that needle jump!
Friday-J: Just send $1 to PO Box 140306 Dallas TX 75214 and GET RIGHT WITH "BOB"!
Bi_Wet_Gir: I would like to have an extra 2 pairs of breasts
P-Lil: Send $30.
Stang: I'm DEFINITELY feeling anxiety over male erotic expression right now!
Stang: This is EMBARRASSING!
P-Lil: For the breasts send all your cash.
Friday-J: Bi - You could have that. All in a row? Down the front?
Stang: Strange... it's a CHOICE. And it's a WRONG CHOICE!
ChrisLee: i would also like you to have two extra pairs of breasteses
Bunnyboy: Bazooka Joe and his fabulous WonderBra!
E_Strange: Stang..I've been studying the Bob Flannagan Guide To Real Love like you asked me to
P-Lil: Stang: If you'd only take your medicine you'd be all right.
Bi_Wet_Gir: down the front
ChrisLee: teats
Friday-J feels Stang's anxiety, discovers that it is hard and throbbing
Rabbi: Damn you Stang! Take Strange! I just can't fight for him anymore. It's just too painful!
AKABondage: strange - that's ah, my department..
Bunnyboy: Teats and aigs and aigs and teats
^^^SANDMAN: hello
P-Lil: Stang: You're hallucinating that a Pennsylvanian SubGenius minister is making sexual innuendos towards you. TAKE THE PILLS, and it'll go away.
Friday-J: Bi - If you have some one your back, and fell over, you'd bounce back up!
Stang: P-Lil. That's a good idea. My medicine. Be right back.
P-Lil: OK, he's gone. Let's get back to sex.
Stang: Ugh, it's gotten tepid. I can't run this shit up.
st-bubba: izzat what causes that funny gleam in his eye and the hair loss??
Friday-J: How long I wonder before Stang gets to the bottom of the bottle and the 'special' Pil?
Stang: I have to go "cook up" my "stuff."
RevDick: pure guatemalan mule cunts
Booger: no, it makes you grow hair on your palms.
P-Lil: Friday: Not the Pil that turns his lips blue?
Bunnyboy: Yah, Stang and Burt Reynolds in LAND OF THE RUGS
Friday-J: I don't have palms. Maybe hair will grow on my maples?
Friday-J: P-Lil - No, the ANTI-GLEET PIL
^^^SANDMAN: any girl want to chat?
Friday-J: Sandman - How many penii do you have?
P-Lil: Friday: Ah, good timing. Let's watch the Pil take.
E_Strange: Friday...Did you get that "date rape drug" for me to use on Stang. He's still denying his true feelings for me
ChrisLee: any girl wanna go on a kill spree using rakes?
^^^SANDMAN: 3 why?
Friday-J: Strange - Yes, I am bringing all of my SPECIAL 'CLEAN' PILS
ChrisLee: any girl wanna do my dishes?
Nully: Oh, it's BUNNY!
Friday-J: Sandman - Aw, only 3? Aren
Friday-J: Aren't you saved?
Booger: any girl and or guy wanna get it on?
Bi_Wet_Gir: are you all this hyper and psychotic?
st-bubba: strange: you dont need a date rape drug, merely a stout chain and a 2 ton winch, and then his feelings wont matter for much of a problem anyhow
P-Lil: Stang, I want you to count backwards and close your eyes while the Pil kicks in. Concentrate on that dead baby stapled to the wall.
ChrisLee: any girl wanna learn Chinese and come over and watch movies with me and tell me if the credits match what is being said, while they are nekkid?
Friday-J: Bi - yes, thank you.
Booger: bi_wet_girl:
Bi_Wet_Gir: oh
ChrisLee: not credits, the subtitles- WHAT A FAUX PAX I MADE!
Friday-J: Many girls with many breasts at
*** Bi_Wet_Girl has left channel #subgenius
Bunnyboy: Subteatles
Friday-J: Meet the Teatles
ChrisLee: Bi- there are usually twice as many of us, on PCP.
Booger: anyone wanna come over here, strip down to their skivvies, watch a few gwar videos and then wax nolstaga about gwar woman's tits?
Friday-J: Yellow Subteatline
E_Strange: Damm you all!! YOU CAN'T HAVE STANG! HE'S MINE!! ALL MINE!!
Friday-J hands Stang to Strange, sobbing gently
AKABondage: I'll WAX raw-GWOMAN tits...
Friday-J: After all, tomorrow is another day
*** ^^^SANDMAN^^^ has left channel #subgenius
RevLurch: boobs, cunt, ass, rat with a dick that long
ChrisLee: Buglove is gonna marry a human!
P-Lil: Friday: Don't worry, hon, Stang will be back. Might be missing all his teeth and need a colostomy bag, but he'll be back.
Friday-J: Lurch - Cafe Flesh?
Friday-J hands Stang some John Fogerty
RevLurch: my two cents
P-Lil: The Pil is kicking in.
E_Strange: Friday..I am willing to share with you. wink wink.. wick half do you want?
Friday-J: Strange - The half that doesn't TALK
Stang: Got me a new cuppa cafe flesh.... new cafe flesh...
Bunnyboy hands Stang some Subdudes
E_Strange: Friday...but he talks out of both ends
Stang: God damn it, I'm gonna have to haul GGG up to NY in my van! He's SURE to get us busted.
MDisaster: Howdy, all.
P-Lil: Strange: He doesn't talk out of his middle.
Friday-J: Strange - One end is easier to "cork" if you know what I mean and I think you do
Friday-J: Hi MD, how many pussies do you have?
P-Lil: COOL. X-Day without Stang *or* Gordon!
DrBuglove: Not to mention you'l have to have the van fumigated...
Friday-J: Fri-X-Day!
Stang: Do you possess any of the MIGRATING SIDE-PUSSIES? I have three Sterno Elbow Dicks.
Booger: buglove is going to marry a human, i'm going to marry chrislee!
Friday-J: The van will be OVER-FUMIGATED.
Booger glomps onto chrislee
Friday-J spots some Kassner Head in the bushes
Stang: Pastor Craig seemed to think that taking drugs is "cool," on alt.slack.
P-Lil: Stang: Why would I tell you whether I had migrating side-pussies after what you did to my midget?!?
E_Strange: Reminds me of that movie with Stang and Gordon in a Mexican prison. "Caged Meat" I think it was called. Very hot.
MDisaster: No, but I have pubic hair growing out of my armpits.
Friday-J: Stang - Everyone knows that the really cool people in this Church, like you and me, never TOUCH drugs! Never have, never will!
Stang: P-Lil, do you have that midget's phone number? I lost it.
Friday-J: OK, I lied. I am not cool.
P-Lil: Stang: She doesn't want to talk to you. She'll call her brother if you try to call her.
DrBuglove has never done drugs.....
Friday-J: MDisaster - You can find out how to grow more genitalia by visiting!
st-bubba: friday: you wear rubber gloves with your drugs?? doesnt that taint the flavour??
Stang: Friday -- you, me, and Craig. And Lou. Oops, Lou quit. Shit. I guess it's just the three of us.
Friday-J: Craig is the COOLEST
Booger: im the coolest
P-Lil: Stang: You remember her brother--the one that was grabbing the audience one by one and hanging them over the balcony, with the nipple suspension cords.
Friday-J: He's so cool he's HAIRLESS. And you're so cool you're HAIRY
DrBuglove: I am the antithesis of cool...
Friday-J: Bug - Guess you're HOT then!
P-Lil: Lou quit? Wow. I guess he's cool now.
E_Strange: Stang is ignoring me. Man, he IS the coolest
Stang: P-Lil, I don't remember any of that. I think I was high on "cool" or "chiva".
DrBuglove: That's me Friday!!!! <G>
Booger: thats shiva
AKABondage: p-lil - is this one coming? we can do a tag-team show!
Stang: Yeah, Lou said to take him off the List.
P-Lil: Stang: Maybe you were hanging upside-down over the steel vat just then.
*** ^Thea^ ( has joined channel #subgenius
Friday-J: Hi Thea!
DrBuglove: Actually the little woman is thinking of coming to X-day, so she'll HAVE to be converted.... Heh heh heh.....
^Thea^: Hi Friday
Friday-J: Oh, how I wish that Stang would ignore me! That would be so cool!
Stang: Yo Thea!! Only 28 days to the DAY!
P-Lil: AKA: I don't think you're his type, but we can see. Put some ink on your bunghole, make a print, and send it to the Foundation.
st-bubba: need a smoke..anyone want a beer or something from the fridge??
DrBuglove: Friday, with those knockers, there's NO WAY IN HELL he could ignore ya!
Bunnyboy: Stang: Me no take drugs
P-Lil: I'd rather be jaded than cool any day.
E_Strange: Friday...sorry. Goes to show that he loves me best
Stang: I have been doing so many cool drugs for so long, overdosing nightly, that the only way I can get high now is to smoke cool nerds.
Friday-J: I'd rather be garnet than jaded
Bunnyboy: Fooled ya!
^Thea^: Are you flying into to Cleveland or Erie Stang?
Booger: or rubied
Friday-J: Starnge (sniff) How can I compete with such a purty man???
Stang: Cool nerds that don't take drugs. They get you REALLY high. Of course you have to KILL them to get the "stuff."
*** Mode change "+o ^Thea^" on #subgenius by Nully
Bunnyboy: Adrenaweenie
Friday-J: Suck out their cool-nerd glandular essences with a sharpened metal straw
Stang: Thea -- for X-Day we're driving up in the BustMobile.
P-Lil: Stang: Scrape the insides of their skulls clean, dry the scrapings out, mix with ethanol, strain that out, then lick the bowl clean once the ethanol evaporates.
Friday-J is a nerd, but not cool. Am I safe?
E_Strange: Friday...You'll never have what Stang really loves in a woman....A DICK
DrBuglove: Oh Stang, StangBot '98 is almost ready here at the Institute..... All ready for work after we've skipped the planet!
P-Lil: Friday: There's too much of you to smoke.
Bunnyboy: Eviscerate them with a plastic protractor
Friday-J: Strange - Actually I do, but it's just not ENOUGH for that size-queen!
Stang: BugLove -- good work, lads!
P-Lil: Strange: Please don't say things like that. Now you're disturbing ME>
^Thea^: Cool, if your route takes you through Cowlumbus plan a pit stop here (we no longer live in the ghetto- we live in an actual suburb now)
Friday-J: Stang really loves a dick in a women - HIS DICK.
Stang: You don't smoke the NERD, you just smoke the SQUEAZIN'S from the nerd! Duh!
E_Strange: P-lil....That's a short trip
Friday-J: Stang - So, how much do you plan to squeeze out of me?
P-Lil: Strange: That's it--I need a LONG trip.
Stang: If you were to smoke the juice from some dope fiend, like P-Lil, it would probably kill you or else cause a 7-year bummer, like what happened to me that one time.
P-Lil: Long, drawn-out, Stang-free....
DrBuglove: Stang did you want the white suit, or we do have a cool nehru jacket ensemble that looks cool on StangBot....
st-bubba: lil: i take it that it actually being ATTACHED to stang at that moment isnt a neccessary qualifier though?
P-Lil: That's right. You gotta be a REAL MAN to smoke my squeezings.
Stang: Thea -- you moved?
Bunnyboy: Thet's SNEEZINS
Stang: Make sure Jesus has your new address, Thea.
P-Lil: Bubba: Nope.
^Thea^: Yes, I got sick of dodging bullets,
^Thea^: I will e mail it to him.
P-Lil: Bunnyboy: You know the rumors of me having orgasms with every sneeze aren't true.
Stang: Friday -- that stuff I got out of you last time is ALMOST GONE, believe it or not! I can't WAIT until X-day weekend!
Stang: I've got a JONES on!
^Thea^: The new place is groovy. It has a hot tub.
P-Lil: I get orgasms when I rub my nose with tissue.
Stang: Thea -- that's "Him"
P-Lil: Different thing.
Friday-J: Stang - Maybe I should just mail you a bottle to tide you over.
Stang: Buglove -- use a striped "golfing kimono"
^Thea^: Aw come on, we are on a first name basis do I really have to refer to HIM reverentually?
Bunnyboy: Lil: I did not know that. Wild, weird, wacky stuff.
E_Strange: Friday..don't worry..I'm on it
Friday-J: Stang - Are you MOCKING my present again?
MDisaster: I have an orgasm every time I take a breath.
Stang: Friday, you know that an amateur like you can't extract your own Undrugged Essence Squeazin's!!
Stang: Thea -- gotta keep up appearances!!!!
Bunnyboy: Lil: Next you'll say Pavarotti doesn't drop a load in his pants when he hits high C
Friday-J: Stang - Not even if I use both hands and a jelly rubber prairie squid prototype?
DrBuglove: Stang... Golfing Kimino.... Check! Now for underthings.... Boxers, briefs, or blowin' in the wind?
Stang: Friday, no I plan to preach in that kimono from now on. It looks more cultish and goes with my Aum Supreme style hairdo.
Friday-J: MDisaster - Hey, that's my breath you're taking! Give it back!
Stang: Buglove -- I always wear those radioactive glowing Dobbshead shorts.
P-Lil: Buglove: Hangin' In The Haze.
Friday-J: Stang - Do I get the tux in exchange? If so, don't wash it!
P-Lil: Bunnyboy: I'm not into opera.
MDisaster: Friday-J: Sorry, I'm saving `em up.
E_Strange milks his own savory juices for Stang's consumption
P-Lil gets a buzz off of Friday's breast breath
Stang: Friday -- no way am I gonna let you get your test tubes on MY squeazin's! I saw that voodoo doll in your boudioir!
DrBuglove: Stang Dobbshead shorts.... ok.... Now did you want the clean shaven look to lure the masses or keep with the demonic facial hair?
Stang: Did I spell "boodwahr" right?
P-Lil: Strange: Need a carafe for that?
Bunnyboy: Newsflash: Italian Tenor "Scat" Singer!
P-Lil: Stang: You missed by an extra I.
P-Lil: Bastard.
P-Lil: How dare you.
Stang: Buglove -- Fu Manchu devil beard and long Rasputin style hair.
Friday-J: BugLove - Get the Lego facial hair that snaps on and off
Friday-J: Boudoir?
P-Lil: We should slit your ass open and pack groundhogs in the cuts.
E_Strange: Boodwahr? Wasn't that the guy who played Benson on that TV show?
Stang: GROUNDHOGS??? Sissy.
Friday-J: Stang - But that doll is for my ENEMIES, not you dear Stang! You would never cheat me or lie to me or deceive me!
P-Lil: Stang: Not these groundhogs. We've got them TRAINED.
^Thea^: Wolverines
Bunnyboy: Benson and Hedgehogs
*** Signoff: MegaLiz ((Game Overman))
P-Lil: Stang: Shut up or we'll try naked mole rats.
Bunnyboy: in the Boudoir
Friday-J: Bunny - now that's MEAN.
E_Strange: cept me
Friday-J: Pack him full of Merit Ultra Lights
^Thea^: Naked Mole Rat is my hubbies Native American name.
Stang: I can take it. I've got 5 pineapples packed up my ass right now as we speak, just for PRACTICE for the Battle of Armageddeon.
RevLurch: saliva thins
Bunnyboy: Friday: I speak naught butt the troot
MDisaster: pineapple cannon
RevLurch: he can take it and he can dole it out
E_Strange: Stang...go for six. Trust me. You'll need it
Friday-J: Stang - I know your Armageddon strategy - you're hoping the Holocaustals will be tired out from raping all the Ivangelical women and won't be able to take your ass!
^Thea^: Well one of them, the other name is Superfluous Cacophany Zebra.
P-Lil: Stang: Fine, I got the scalpel and the cages full of naked mole rats. Bend over and let's get this over with.
MDisaster: RevLurch: dole ... hehe
DrBuglove: Ok....... once the StangBot is finished, it will go into storage at our secret facilities and activate once you leave the Earth. That way if there's any survivors... well, it can start all over again, just like last time...
Stang: "Me Big Chief Hot Headed Naked Ice Borer." How."
ChrisLee: hostage negotiations and X-Day travel details both advanced
Friday-J: Bring pineapple rings and we'll play Ring-Toss with Legume
Booger: sweeet!
E_Strange: Make those little rings.
^Thea^: My native American name is Vile Degraded Swamp Creature.
Booger: its the "homer joins a new religon" episode!
Friday-J: Pinky rings instead?
E_Strange: Why do you think Legume is so mean?
^Thea^: Our son is Smirking Fart Bird.
Stang: Buglove -- GOOD! Hell, that Stangbot'll probably get more gigs after X-Day than I ever got before.
Booger: "i love the leader"
RevLurch: mine is Drunk and Out of Work
Friday-J: Buglove - Please make sure that the StangBot does not SNORE or insist on sleeping in a superhero mask.
Stang: I think Legume is mean because he was mistreated as a child. And because "HE'S A DUMBASS."
Booger: this seems a little too much like the subgenius
Stang: Actually, Legume is mean merely because he loves Dobbs.
E_Strange: Friday..In other worsd. Stang without the personality
*** Bunnyboy has set the topic on channel #subgenius to Mort du Samoanes Diabolique
P-Lil: My injun name is "Throws Rocks At Bison Gonads"
Friday-J: Strange - No, just quiet while he's asleep.
DrBuglove: Well, we've already got something up at brushwood later in July... and then there's some other things scheduled... Jesus knows to forward the requests for you after X-day to the Institute, right?
RevLurch: who the fuck wasn't mistreated as a child?
Stang: Well, Vile Degraded Swamp Creature, meet my son, Two Dogs Fucking.
st-bubba: my indian name is "he with the day glo eyes"
E_Strange: Actually, He tried to love Dobbs, but he laughed at his member
*** GGGORDON ( has joined channel #subgenius
Booger: that hotwheels race car track is a bitch to get a spanking with
Friday-J: Meat my other son, Lying Flat Face With Pipe
Friday-J: Speaking of Dobbs, here's GGG!
P-Lil: Hau, Better Injun Than Jigaboo, how is your wife Flaps In The Wind?
RevLurch: Farts Like Moose
Friday-J: Tastes Like Chicken
Stang: Buglove -- yeah. I doubt if anybody down there will get many calls from the Escape Vessels. If the phones still work.
Bunnyboy: Breaks like Hurricane
RevLurch: Chief Rain in the Pants
GGGORDON: but tell me Two Dogs Fucking, why do you want to know?
^Thea^: Bud is also known as Running Jew
Stang: It's Big Chief Artificial Septum!
*** Booger has set the topic on channel #subgenius to Rev. Ivan Stang: he's alright, but he's no bowl of special K!
GGGORDON: thass perforated septum stangky
Bunnyboy: Noble Brave Deviated Sepsis
Friday-J: Chief Iron Heart And Rubber Dick
RevLurch: Jewish Actor Playing Injun
*** MDisaster is now known as MiloD
Nully: i bought this greeeting card today: I am an alien creature. I was sent from another planent with a message of good-will from my people. The message says: Dear Earth-people when you finally at last destroy your planet and have no place to live you can come live with us and we will teach you how to live in peace and harmony and we will give you a coupon for 10% off all deep-dish pizzas too. SIncerely, Bob
DrBuglove: Stang, We got the lines set up to switch over to the institute automatically after armageddon, that way the survivors that realize that we were right can contact someone that will say "I told you so!"
Stang: GGG -- you know that Best Frop in the Universe that I got for X-Day? Well, it's gone. But I'll get more. You DO have Byron's frappy for him, rtight?
Friday-J: Let's all slide barefoot across the Ice
GGGORDON: yeah if sterno hasn't woofed it all.
Stang: Buglove -- well, we have THOUSANDS of continuous "told you so" messages in many media planned to go off automatically at 7 am -- from volcanoes to aurora-borealis movies.
P-Lil puts some frappie on a block of methane ice and heats both with her lighter
GGGORDON: if you think I'm getting in the Stangmovan WITHOUT TBFIU you're dreaming stangker
Friday-J: And including GIF-movies
P-Lil: *suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck*
P-Lil: WOOF. Good stuff. Want some, Gordon?
MiloD: Let's carve "I told you so" into Mt.Rushmore.
GGGORDON: shoot that gage thissaway ace
Stang: GGG -- don't fret, I talked to "The Man Who Knows."
NedWreck: or fit the heads with pipes
Friday-J: "Bob" Told Me, It Sold Me, That Settles It!
P-Lil slides the block of methane ice across the floor to Gordon
^Thea^: We could paint I Told You So on the Washington Monument.
GGGORDON: the man who knows better be the man who HAS stang, I'm serious.
NedWreck: booom!
DrBuglove: We will have to have a moment of reverence on the saucers for the men and women staying behind at the massive Buglove Institute, giving thier salvation for our cause....
Friday-J: We could put a giant condom on the Washington Monument
RevLurch: paint a pussy on the washington monument
Stang: We could USE the Washingtom Monument to etch "I TOLD YOU SO" in the GRAND CANYON! Or in MANHATTAN!
Stang: We'll have GODZILLAS spell out "HAVE A NICE DAY" in SWATHS through DOWNTOWNS.
Friday-J: We could set a thousand Godzilla loose in Manhattan who bellow "I TOLD YOU SO!" And all have Pipes.
GGGORDON leans over the block, ignites a phosphorus grenade and huffs up all the smoke and burning methane at once
GGGORDON: smoooooooooooth
P-Lil: I'd rather use the Washington Monument to fuck "I TOLD YOU SO" into the Grand Canyon, then spooj "I TOLD YOU SO" over the Midwest.
NedWreck: the lease is up
Friday-J: "Bob"zilla LIVES!
ChrisLee: 23 story Fred Sanford destroys Watts!
^Thea^: We don't want it back now that it has been so badly used.
P-Lil: Yes, lots of Godzillas. I was dreaming of an army of Xist Godzillas this morning.
st-bubba: carefully lay the charred and barbq'ed remains of the us population out along the prairies in one of them big "eat at phils" things.....
Stang: We can rearrange the Great Wall of China to make it say, "KILLROY WAS HEAR"
P-Lil: Gordon: Good thing I got first hit. Jeez, there's not even ASH left.
RevLurch: yor the fiberglass dinosaur putt-putt course
GGGORDON: I'd rather stick the washington monument up pat robertson's ass, before I shoved them both up Newt Ginrich's urethra
Stang: We can change the configuration of the Ring of Fire into a Smiley face and then make all the volcanos active.
GGGORDON: sorry lil, but I am a man of appetite
DrBuglove: But not the new godzilla, the old, lumbering, "I don't give a shit and I'm not scared of anything" Godzilla...
ChrisLee: well DUH, Buglove!
Stang: ALL the creatures at miniature golf courses will come to life.
Friday-J: Isn't anyone here curous about the Xist culture? We all talk about our own stuff, but isn't anyone curous about what the Xists are really like, when they aren't our devoted slaves?
GGGORDON: yeah, the old wobbly rubber godxilla, that's the ticket
RevLurch: and Ultra Man
Stang: On that Day, we can make every child's toy come alive and all march into the ocean.
GGGORDON: damn them bobbies, they got entirely too much money
RevLurch: ever notice that the science police drove Corvairs?
Friday-J: Store in Boston has Ultraman Lawn Gnomes.
P-Lil: Xists don't have personality. They're like Pastor Craig, only smart.
NedWreck: or just every child
st-bubba: friday: culture?? who gives a fuck about the culture? i want their DRUGS. i want their weapons of mass destruction. culturescmulture
^Thea^: Stang, do kids fly free on the Ships?
Stang: Friday -- that question, "WHAT ABOUT THE XISTS," is so frightening, that it, like "WHERE ARE WE ESCAPING *TO*," IS NOT ASKED.
GGGORDON: me I want their ever regenerating supersquid ultravirgins
P-Lil: Gordon: The Bobbies tend the frappie crops, and most of the time I can't even get a tiny plastic bag full of the stuff. This time I killed most of the clones, so I got a bigger crop.
Friday-J: Stang - Ah, I see. I shall "see" more when it is TOO LATE to STOP SEEING I daresay ...
GGGORDON: save some for x-day
Stang: We are no more able to understand the Xists on ANY level than we would be able to understand "GOD."
GGGORDON: friday, that was so fuckin' profound I hereby promote you to Uberwench First Class
Stang: Everything will be so utterly radically different that not even 1,000 LSD trips could prepare you for it. (All those trips for NOTHING!!!)
DrBuglove: When we get to Planet X we better live it up before Duck Dodgers comes along in the 24 and a half century and blows it to shit....
Friday-J: I saved all my trips for the Saucers.
GGGORDON: and you get to wear those new really shiny boots friday
P-Lil: Stang: You're not counting on all those $30 members being CREATIVE, are you?!?
E_Strange: We should burn a Dobbshead stencil into the ozone layer. It would make one of those dod pictures with sun-burned pinks
GGGORDON: and that leather skirt
GGGORDON: and you can carry that Nickiewhip
ChrisLee: Take my advice or I'll spank you without pants!
Stang: But here's another thing. What if you're all happily ensconced on your Escape Planet, idly picking off old enmies while having perverted sex, when suddenly, YOUR ESCAPE PLANET IS NUKED OUT OF EXISTENCE BY DR. LEGUME'S!!
Friday-J: GGG - I hope those boots are waterproof, Brushwood is damp early in the morning. Also if I put my boot up someone's butt I don't want my feet to get wet ...
Friday-J: Stang - WHAT A WAY TO GO!!!!!
ChrisLee: Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected!
Friday-J: GGG - Nickie can keep her whip, I have my own thank you.
RevLurch: they gonna walk around?
GGGORDON: nuked by legume...sounds like a fox miniseries stang
Friday-J: "Business is like shitting, smoothness is very important."
ChrisLee: Damn it Friday! Are you reading the same book I am?!?
AKABondage: like nails
Stang: WHo was it that hurled that great insult on alt.slack, about, "You're so lame, your Escape Vessel will look just like your cruddy apartment, all the way down to the spots on the ceiling"...?
P-Lil: I'm more worried about what happens when Stang's Escape Dick is freed from its Escape Fly and is being waved in my Escape Planet's Escape Face.
Friday-J: "Don't worry, I won't constipate you."
GGGORDON: I was using the term nickiewhip as a generic term, I meant you can now wield the giver/bringer of pain
Friday-J: ChrisLi - I'm reading over your shoulder.
ChrisLee: Gawd damn it!
P-Lil: Stang; That was me.
Friday-J: GGG - The tasp and anti-tasp? Kewl!
GGGORDON: you got it, and save some batteries for me
P-Lil: Stang: Was dissing Craig for the hell of it.
Friday-J: "I'll shoot aimlessly if you don't come out!"
Stang: P-lil, that was a truly TRULY great insult.
P-Lil: Stang: Just make sure to include the copyright notice when quoting me.
ChrisLee: Damn Friday, I'll burn you into BBQ chicken!
NedWreck: better a crappy excape vessel than no excape vessel at all, just ask all them Titanic dead people
Friday-J: My Escape Vessel will look like cruddy old Stang, right down to the spots on his neck (I almost typed 'her neck')
E_Strange: My escape vessel is going to look like a late model Chevy Malibu and I'm going to keep the Xists in the trunk
Stang: Chris -- Friday barbecued... my mouth waters.
DrBuglove: Well all, gotta go, the woman wants me to engage in some "sin and debauchery" research for the Buglove Institute of Sexual Technology! Whatta Trooper!!!
Stang: HEY! Those spots are VAMPIRE SCARS!
GGGORDON: my escape vessel is prolly gonna look like Philo's escape vessel, only cleaner
Friday-J rolls in the pit of Winking Lizard Saucer
Stang: I EARNED those scars.
NedWreck: who's bringing the purple kool-aid?
P-Lil: I'm already laughing at all the dumbshitz whose "escape vessel" looks like a Lost In Space saucer on the outside and a Greyhound bus on the inside.
Friday-J: Stang - May I add some more scars?
RevDick: i just crawl into my bass case and generate new sexual organs
GGGORDON: sheeeit lil. what about those poor fewkers whose vessel looks like a Nash metroplitan and when you get inside you're in your high school cafeteria
Stang: What do we need to ask the Subs to bring to X-Day at Brushwood? PARTY DECORATIONS.... PURPLE KOOL AID... WARHEADS... what else? Extra Shoes...
NedWreck: P-lil: dammit! that's My escaple vessel
GGGORDON: stang...what about the frop
^Thea^: Apple Sauce, pudding, purple shrouds.
Friday-J: Stang - Extras socks. Money in small, unmarked bills. Extra soap. Don't worry, I'll post it.
MiloD: The inside of my escape vessel will be like "The Dawn of the Dead" inside the mall.
NedWreck: beer
DrBuglove: Stang tell them to bring women with copious breasts.....
GGGORDON: frop frop frop
NedWreck: more beer
P-Lil: Gordon: Some people you can't help. Gonna run them over with my escape saucer--it's shaped like a Peterbilt on the outside and like the inside of the Kremlin on the inside. Only with black-light posters enstuf.
Stang: I hope that my escape vessel will eventually look vaguely Earth-like only as designed by my fevered imagination influenced by Warner Borrothers cartoons and Jack Kirby monsters.
^Thea^: Warm clothes, blankets.]
E_Strange: Stang...You bring the warhead and I'll fish the delivery system out of the pond
P-Lil: Gordon: We'll attach Dobbstown Lagrange and drag its frop gardens behind us.
GGGORDON: my escape vesselnis gonna look like the inside of Cameron Diaz's vagina
Stang: Yes... pudding... shrouds... vodka... phenobarbital... cianide... NO WAIT... we're not KILLING ourselves! YET!
GGGORDON: church air stang church air
Friday-J: Bring things with the NIKE LOGO on them. I have gloves.
MiloD: GGGORDON: I have to say, that's the best escape-vessel idea yet.
GGGORDON: and compressed tanksoul, don't forget the tanksouls
Friday-J: Stang - Yeah, you need the Robt Williams Escape Vessel
P-Lil: And Robert Williams posters in the bathroom.
GGGORDON: thanks miloD it was between her vagina and Pandora's peaks
P-Lil: Friday, that's too good an idea to let Stang possess all to himself. We should make that an Open Vessel.
Bunnyboy: the Robert Williams Escape Vessel won't fit on 2 pages
GGGORDON: you talkin about ann margaret and chocalate sauce/pudding miloD
Friday-J: P-Lil - All vessels are interconnected on the Etheric Plane. Let Legume explode your saucer, and he'll only find you on HIS.
MiloD: I want one of those needle-sarcophagii from the "acid-queen" sequence in me vessel.
GGGORDON: besides that they're all hooked together thru Mwowm channels and as none of are gonna be real anyway...we can ride where the fuck we pkease
P-Lil: Friday: I'm rigging my saucer so any attacks from the outside only damage the attacker. From the inside, well, you'll be kinda strapped down inside my saucer....
Mannerheim: so is the world going to end july 5th?
NedWreck: nope
Friday-J: Mannerhein - Yours might, not ours!
GGGORDON: not a chance
RevDick: i need to do blueprints...gahh so little time
Bunnyboy: Mannerheim: Need you ask? ISN'T IT OBVIOUS?!?
Stang: Friday -- that's true; the second Legume exploded your saucer, you could instantly recreate it -- infact you could recreate thousands and use them to CRUSH HIS... it would be an insane ever-escalating violent cartoon war.
AKABondage: thanks friday - im a fraid i dont have many fonts here.. oh well..
Mannerheim: so what happens july 6th when nothing happened?
E_Strange: course not. Silly of you to think so
Friday-J: Stang - Maybe I'll send my Sex Goddes mind-clone to do that while I catch up on my reading.
GGGORDON: I plan to create black holes and crush legume into tidal powder if he fux w/moi
Bunnyboy: Nothing will happen July 6th
Friday-J: Mannerhein - There won't BE a July 6th!
P-Lil: Mannerheim: That's part of the joke. When you die you'll go to a world JUST LIKE THIS ONE, where you'll think you DIDN'T die and the world DIDN'T end.
Bunnyboy: It's July 5th when EVERYTHING happens
Stang: It would be like Nenslo's most insane nightmare... where the levels of GALACTIC-SIZED DESTRUCTION would become SO BARELY-IMAGINABLE... and that would just be the boys ROUGHHOUSING!
Friday-J: A world of NO SLACK
P-Lil: Mannerheim: In reality your prostate will be eaten by demons every day.
Stang: I guess the real test of the post-X-Day SubGenius world will be, WHOSE MINDS CAN *HANDLE* it?
GGGORDON: and maybe with NO NENSLO
Bunnyboy: And Stang and Jesus DIDN'T take the money, and head for Tijuana.
MiloD: I want to learn to controle space and time. Wouldn't it be neet to be able to create spatial "bubbles"?
Friday-J: Stang - It'll be like Lensman, with entire galaxies turned into anti-matter and hurtled about just for FIREWORKS!
E_Strange: What happened yesterday, nothing. What happened today, nothing. What will happen on July 6 th, NOTHING
P-Lil: Milo: TEMPORAL bubbles are more spetacular.
Stang: Many will surely fall by the wayside, terminally baffled by, say, being immersed in a JANOR REALITY crossed with a , uh, CRAIG REALITY... or whatever.
Friday-J: Milo - Just one? Or millions?
GGGORDON: sheeit it'll be like Stapledon when the last men compress the universe into a ball and put it in a safe place until the fighting ends
P-Lil: That is how the earth shall be destroyed, then--we will force all our realities on the planet ALL AT ONCE.
GGGORDON: or was that van Vogt....?
Bunnyboy: Lil: Nah, that happens alla time. Still standing!
Friday-J: Vernor Vinge, 'Marooned In Realtime'
GGGORDON chex memory core and finds some areas damamged
P-Lil: Bunnyboy: But we're not using Xist amplification yet.
Stang: The people who have read the WEIRDEST and MOST SCI FI will be the best equipped to handle the Post X-Day Escape Vessels Universe.
Stang: They will be able to OUT-FREAK-OUT their rivals.
GGGORDON replaces damaged regions and goes looking for lost memories
Mannerheim: out-freak-out?
Friday-J: Stang - I have done my best to prepare you in the SF department darling. Now it's up to you.
GGGORDON: don't you mean freak-out-freaK????
P-Lil: Stang: Don't forget German porn, that counts.
NedWreck: i haven't lost mine, i just replaced them with better false ones
Friday-J hopes for the OOLOI SAUCER
GGGORDON: ned: those were some of my best false memories I lost
Stang: Friday, I really appreciate your help, only... is it true that all science fiction is about buxotic redhead tough bitches that kick everybody's ass and must be obeyed? Or is that just a coincidence?
E_Strange: Mannerheim? That's German aint it? Fucking kraut. Shouldn't you be making lampshades or soap or something?
Mannerheim: no its finnish
Friday-J: Stang - That's the way the universe really is, honey, get used to it.
Mannerheim: finland
P-Lil: Stang: Sure, that's true.
Friday-J: Mannerheim 0 Can you cook finnan haddie?
Stang: P-Lil -- yeah, I guess a good foundation in pornography would also be very helpful in the Escape Vessel Wars.
Mannerheim: maybe you need to read more shit, strange
P-Lil: In my universe, I'm a redhead. That shows up now and then.
GGGORDON: aw friday since Poul Anderson got senile maybe.....but wot about....
Stang: Strange... not all Nazis make lampshades.
GGGORDON: friday that's scottish not finnish
Stang: Only the Holocaustal Nazis. The Ivangelical Nazis were sex maniacs instead.
Friday-J: Some Nazis make great bellhops, and they come with their own uniform.
P-Lil: Some Nazis make tallow instead.
E_Strange: Finlanf? Sorry...Shouldn'd you be fucking the sheep then?
Friday-J: GGG - Thanks for the correction. So, is Finland good for anything at all?
P-Lil: Some Nazis plus some more Nazis make a lot of Nazis.
Friday-J: Stang - I'll try to organize a bonfire after the Battle of Armageddon, your heirs can film lots of squirrel shots of SubG's dancing naked around it
GGGORDON: you know as I know a great deal about pornography, terrorism and scifi si I oughta have a rockin' good time
E_Strange: Stangg...true, some Nazi skin is far too thin to make proper leather
NedWreck: condoms
Friday-J: Thinskinned Nazis - a nasty bunch, and they don't cook up very well either.
GGGORDON: like in the old day the buttocks of Prussian cavalry officers yielded primo cuero
P-Lil: Rice Paper Nazi Potstickers.
Stang: GGG -- I would imagine that those who aren't schooled in time travel loop-errors will find themselves ALL fucked up.
Stang: There will be Bobbies who spend all Eternity saying, "Hmmm, wonder what this Time Loop button does, I think I'll push it..."
E_Strange: Friday...yeah, but a thin skinned Nazi tastes better than a Jew any day. Trust me. I know.
P-Lil: Stang: That's what temporal bubbles are for. You don't travel in time, you isolate the part of universe you want to fuck with and move it "forward" or "back".
GGGORDON: yeah it's gonna be interesting to watch those people who thought we were dumbasses for reading all that shit stumble and bumble their way around
Friday-J: Strange - I'm not disputing it, Jews underfeed themselves and aren't properly marbled with fat
Stang: GGG -- if it weren't that they have plenty of extra "lives" like in a video game, they'd be PLUMB out of luck.
NedWreck: if they ate more pork...
Friday-J: No, haven't seen rbarnes tonight
Stang: Ed, have you been eating little po'bucker girls again?
GGGORDON: and we appreciate the fuckhead bit shitheel
E_Strange: Friday...Not to mention they're kosher. I hate kosher
Friday-J: Strange - Catch a Jewgirl and fatten her on pork
E_Strange: Stang...Every chance I get
GGGORDON: can you imagine what happens the first time they run into a chronosynclastic infundibulum????
NedWreck: they're great pickled
E_Strange: Friday...What do you think I've been doing with the Rabbi
P-Lil: Gordon: I'd disconnect permanently from any escape vessel that was trying a chronosynclastic infundibulum.
Stang: I worry about what kind of concentration-camp-like planets some of you SubGenii will have.
MiloD: all this talk about food is making me hungry
GGGORDON: depends which end of the funnel you get Lil
P-Lil: Or is that "infidelbulim"?
Mannerheim: after july 5th, will anyone be online? or pretend to have disappeared?
NedWreck: but not too much, huh?
GGGORDON: infidelbulimia...skinny christian woman
AKABondage: stang Entertainoville Concentrato!
Friday-J: Mannerheim - Our "shells" may remain but we will be gone, trust me
E_Strange: Typical Stang. He talks the talk but doesn't have the stomache to walk the walk
Stang: My Escape Planet will be mostly like an Alien Wilderness Preserve with giant dinosaur-insect monsters roaming around, and flora like an old psychedelic black light poster.
Mannerheim: ok I think i'm getting it now
AKABondage: My escape planet will be a DIMENSION!
Friday-J: Stang - May I visit your saucer if I write and ask for permission in advance?
Mannerheim: you take out of state checks?
P-Lil: Stang: My escape solar system will send meteors and comets towards your escape planet.
Friday-J: Mannerhein - They have to clear by 7/5/98!
GGGORDON: your escape planet is going to look like your fuckin office only bigger, messier and with thousands of Jessi clamoring for your attention Stang
Stang: Friday -- all you'll have to do is make a deposit in the Juice Lock, and it'll let you in.
P-Lil: Mannerheim: Get a money order or use a credit card.
NedWreck: i still think it would be better if the saucers took the pinks and left us
Mannerheim: do you barter?
Stang: GGG -- NOOO!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!
Friday-J: Stang - OK, I just hope you aren't standing on the other side of the door "presenting" through the lock or anything
GGGORDON: ned: we'd have to clean up after them, you up for that???
E_Strange: Any check but one from the Sawtooth National Bank
Stang: Lonesome Cowboy Dave foresaw Escape Vessels where everything was kinda shoddy and half-assed and nothing worked quite right -- stale air, bad robot butlers...
P-Lil: I think I'm going to add a Grindcore Concert Stage Continent on my Escape Planet.
GGGORDON: and a lot od modems and servers that malfunction constantly
NedWreck: uh, clean what, it's their mess it goes too
Friday-J: Stang - Your Escape Planet will look like the futon in my living room, with endless books and videos around it, and me at the foot of it.
P-Lil: Stang: I guess that's what Lonesome Cowboy Dave will get.
Mannerheim: can I get my money back if I still remain in my shell?
GGGORDON: I'm still hoping for Cameron Diaz's vagina
MiloD: If everyone who knew how to operate a nuclear power plant suddenly disappeared, would that cause problems?
E_Strange: My escape vessel will have big bug eyes and knockers
AKABondage: argh!! why will this paint program not recognize this GIF as valid!
Friday-J: Mannerheim - You get TRIPLE your money back! IF you die and go to Pink Hell - or Heaven for that matter.
P-Lil: Strange: How about buck teeth? Or handholds on the sides of her head?
Stang: P-Lil -- yeah, that's the problem -- if you're a really neurotic SubGenius, or terribly paranoid, your Escape Vessel could easily be a self-fueling ENDLESS HELL.
Mannerheim: how many colors does the gif have
Friday-J: AKAB - Try copying it and saving it as a new document.
AKABondage: my escape vessel will have tittyclamps for e_strange's knockers
NedWreck: my vessel will look alarmingly like the Titanic
GGGORDON: my escape vessel will be an opium suppository
Friday-J: My vessel will be invisible so that the Bobbies can't find me
NedWreck: with lead lifeboats
Mannerheim: who set the topic?
P-Lil: "Shit, Nenslo's Escape Vessel looks like an egg barely big enough for Nenslo, a candle, and a paintbrush.
E_Strange: AKABondage...I guess I'm going to have to start working on growing me a set of knockers
E_Strange: that would make Stang happy
P-Lil: "I think he paints with his own shit."
Stang: I had hoped that when the Rupture happened that the Pink would would be BEREFT of all the people who had actually kept things running, and their world would collapse, but unfortunately, it's more like a world that's missing a few JANITORS, FRY COOKS and "WRITERS" on the DOLE.
Mannerheim: the rupture?
GGGORDON: and aides stang, education aides
P-Lil: Stang: Don't worry, the economic terrorist movement is under SLAK control and funding. We'll let them loose on July 6.
MiloD: My escape vessel will be a self-replicating nano-bot that will take the form of a virus that only infects pinks.
Friday-J: Mannerheim - the Rupture happens July 5th when we are all Caught Up in fire, along with all of our cool possessions, and rematerialize on the Saucers
P-Lil: "He's not suffering in there, you know--he wills fresh coffee into the Escape Egg."
E_Strange: Fuck it. I'm tired of trying to save the un-saved. Time we jack up the price of addmission so only "intelligent" folks cand afford it
Mannerheim: is that supposed to be a knock off of the rapture
AKABondage: friday - who decides which of our possesions are cool?
NedWreck: and almost all of Texas will wake up July 6 and say "Sibo en el planeta"
Friday-J: The Escape Egg secretes coffe, Frop, whatever you like. Even raspberry vinegar delight.
Friday-J: AKABondage - We do, of course!
GGGORDON: and smegma too, if you want it!
AKABondage: what if we want them to be uncool?!
P-Lil: Friday: Not Nenslo's Escape Egg. All it secretes is the same old bitterness as always. But it's CONTENT now.
Stang: Mannerheim -- the Christian so-called "Rapture" is a sad rip-off of Dobbs' 4-thousand-year-old teachings.
Friday-J: AKABondage - Bring whatever the Xists let you bring.
P-Lil: And the inside of the Egg is intricately painted with Nenslo's own dried fecal matter.
P-Lil: You don't want to look at the art too long.
GGGORDON: there will be no cool or uncool, children, stuff will only be stuff without the Con to force judgements and ratings on it
*** Signoff: Mannerheim (Leaving)
GGGORDON: now you scared the Finn Ivan
Stang: P-Lil -- I dunno, if Nenslo's escape vessel is anything like his house, it'll be cool as SHIT and also have Mrs. Nenslo's ULTRA-Kook-Museum in it!
Friday-J: I be going soon chillen, I'm tired. FOUR MORE WEEKS TO GO!
P-Lil: Stang: I wouldn't imagine Nenslo living in a replica of his house after X-Day.
Stang: Nenslo's Earth house is BEYOND "cool."
GGGORDON: yeah stang, but unfortunately it will also contain Nenslo unless we do something about it soon!
AKABondage: Yah I guess I'll ask my good friend the x-ist
P-Lil: Friday: OK, you can sleep in my Escape Cosmos if you want. Just don't tweak Planck's Constant without checking with me, OK?
Stang: GGG-- he was not to be Saved. The Finns are not capable of Slack. They must be exterminated.
Friday-J: P-Lil - Whatever you say honey.
Friday-J lies down flat in front of her computer - can you do that?
Stang: I hope that fucking website of ours stays "up" through July 5.
E_Strange: Fuck the Finns..All they gave us were shitty cough drops anywaw...Fuck'em
P-Lil: Friday: Weird shit happens when you play with Planck's Constant in that Cosmos. I don't quite get all the math yet.
GGGORDON: but the finns invented the sauna stangky, that must count for something, plus their language is totally without inflection
P-Lil: Friday: Nearly, in this chair. I'm definitely prone right now.
GGGORDON: are you on your back Friday
Friday-J: Stang - Just make sure the EMAIL ORDERING section is running
P-Lil: She's on her tummy. *snurf*
Friday-J: GGG - Yup.
P-Lil: Or maybe not.
GGGORDON: I thought so!
Friday-J: Stang has seen my computing arangement.
GGGORDON: no plil if friday is on her tummy she isn't lying down flat
Stang: Friday's computer is mounted at the head of one of her BEDS. You can't SIT at the damned thing except cross-legged. She never gets online without being dressed in some slinky outfit -- or not dressed in anything -- and all ensconced on her bed.
P-Lil: Gordon: Close enough for my appetite.
E_Strange: GGG...great, an entire society that talks like Ben Stein but you can't understand them because there fucking foreigners...Fuck'em and the moose they rode in on
Friday-J: Stang - You look GOOD in slinky outfits (grrrrrlllll)
GGGORDON wonders how Stang knows so much about the layout of Friday's boudoir and her online apparel
Stang: She made me wear women's clothing and diapers before she'd let me use her computer. I HAD to do it.
GGGORDON: reindeer d00d, m00se are N american
Friday-J: GGG - Stang stayed at my pad after the Final Devival. Ate my chili.
P-Lil: Friday: Did you make Stang use a tampon?
Stang: She made me take a bunch of pictures of her POSING like Ann-Margaret at her computer.
Friday-J: Stang - That soft diapered behind ...
GGGORDON: I'll bet he DID!!!! nudge nudge wink wink
P-Lil: Friday: You mean the FINAL Final Devival. "Final Devival" is *my* ho.
Friday-J: Final Boston Devival
GGGORDON: hey wot do you call two hookers helping an old lady across the street????
Friday-J: Stang - Yeah, I had an explosive bolt embedded in your skull to MAKE you take those pics. IN 3-D!
Stang: Friday's chili is pathetic, I'm afraid. But her Bobbie Stew is deeee-lish!
E_Strange: The Finns have something against moose eh? Won't let them in the country? That burns it
P-Lil: You know, I bet if I didn't have the audacity to call MINE the FINAL DEVIVAL, most of the other devivals wouldn't have happened.
Friday-J: Ho Scouts? I dunno.
GGGORDON: support ho's
P-Lil: Other SubGenii decided to show my bitch up, and so spread the Seed Word across this overripe loam of a country.
Stang: I spent Saturday chopping the headers out of ALL THOSE DEVIVAL REPORTS of ALL THOSE TOWNS so's I could HTMLify 'em in the AutoMizer.
Friday-J: Stang - I like your syrup.
P-Lil: Stang: Link to this page:'s my Seattle/Portland devival site.
MiloD hands "wafer-thin mints" to everyone.
GGGORDON: well I think I'm gonna go make some more weird machines
P-Lil: Gordon: Set them loose on your neighbors!
Friday-J: Stang is a passable houseguest, IF there is a restaurant within reach. And a separate room to contain the SNORES.
Friday-J: Bye GGG
Friday-J accepts the mint
GGGORDON: that man can snore can't he
Friday-J: AND he sleeps in a mask!
P-Lil: I wouldn't know. I wouldn't allow myself to know. I wouldn't TRUST him enough to allow myself to know.
GGGORDON: I'm gonna set em loose on Stang
P-Lil: Gordon: That'd work. I want to watch.
GGGORDON: hey if he's asleep withing a hundred feet of'll know
Stang: I was gonna htmlify all that stuff and all the X-Day stuff and all the new Friday Dress-Up Frilly GIF-A-Mations, but then I decided to open these CD ROMS that Mavrides sent me which contained REVELATION X in Pagemaker and EPS files. I spent ALL DAY converting the cool b&w REV-X art to jpgs for SubSITE.
GGGORDON: got two new ones I call slicer and slasher
Friday-J: Stang - Awesome!
Stang: GGG -- have you got any of those scary looking things RUNNING yet?
GGGORDON: Oh stang yer such a toooool!
Friday-J: I think the second SubG book would have sold better if the title had been "Revelation Sex."
Stang: GGG is doing these machines that look like SRL escapees crossed with Martian Scorpions.
P-Lil: Friday: And was put in the Erotica section.
Friday-J: P-Lil - You bet!
Stang: Friday -- NOW you think of it!!!
GGGORDON: I had a squid speared by one, but it was fifty five megs for about four seconds...I just don't have enough room to let the buggers loose
Friday-J: Stang - Didn't know you back then!
Stang: GGG -- I know what you mean. It would take my deck DAYS to skewer a squid properly.
MiloD: GGGORDON: do you make those robots that participate in those "battle of the robots" events?
GGGORDON: you weren't missing anything friday
Friday-J: Not like I know you NOW.
Stang: MiloD -- he WAS one of those robots.
P-Lil: Put a sticker on the front: "Check out page 66, kid, you'll LIKE it. Show Mommie."
Stang: GGG is half bionic.
Friday-J: GGG 0 I missed Stang with his AFRO.
GGGORDON: ya know stang these fuckin computers will NEVER be fast enough for great men
Friday-J: What about MWOWM?
Stang: Some of the grayscale REV-X stuff looks TONS BETTER blown up large on a screen than it did shrunk down at a 130 line screen in the book.
*** Signoff: E_Strange (Read error: 54 (Connection reset by peer))
P-Lil: Stang: Me want make 3D.
GGGORDON: mwow, wot a joke I got pictures of the core matrix of mwowm look at that and you know you're in trouble
MiloD: Do you think it's possible to crack into MWOWM?
Stang: I kind of want to go eat a big bowl of health food store granola mixed with Raison Bran. And Ice Cream.
P-Lil: Raison d'Bran.
Stang: Then I will drink more coffee and take 9 melatonins and 4 nails, and then I will read some more LENSMAN courtesy of Friday.
Friday-J: Stang - Sprinkled on Shelby's belly, no doubt.
Stang: GGG -- Friday gave me "TRIPLANETARY" -- I now see what your PRIME INFLUENCE in LIFE must have been!
GGGORDON: the bit about mwowm being x-ist technology is sheer's a cheap version of the samw Hieronymous Machine that Dobbs sold John Campbell in the early fifties
Friday-J: Melatonin and EE Doc Smith might not mix, Stan g....
Stang: GGG -- say it ain't so!
Friday-J: Good night Stang, enjoy yourself muchly!
Friday-J: Good night P-Lil, see you soon!
P-Lil: I might take off myself.
GGGORDON: Doc Smith was a great influence, Skylark series and all of the lensman books, that's how I found out about thionite and zwilniks
Friday-J: Good night dear GGG, don't die before July!
P-Lil: Gnight Friday. *snugs*
Friday-J: Bye AKA, bring lots of paddles for Stang's ass!
Stang: My god I just realized how much art I ADDED to this mess today. Good Lord Man. The SubGeniuses... truly they are INSANE.
GGGORDON: I'll send you the pix stang
Friday-J: Bye Ned.
MiloD: I'm gone as well.
Friday-J hands Stang some thionite

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