REPORTS on MISC. 1994 CHURCH DEVIVALS

REPORTS on MISC. 1994 CHURCH DEVIVALS

HILIGHT from the Pittsburgh '94 Devival: David Apocalypse of CIRCUS APOCALYPSE uses sterilized piano wire to sew shut the lips of his partner Andrew. Needless to say, this wasn't done until after Andrew had eaten the giant cockroaches and the lightbulb.

Photo by Radio Farm (we believe... correct us if we're wrong.).
A nice close-up of Andrew after the stitching job. Backstage, Papa Joe Mama asked him, 'Doesn't that hurt?' Andrew's mumbled reply: 'Not enough to COME.'


Dallas Video Festival Devival
From: Henry Coleman <henry@jove.acs.unt.edu>
Date: Sat, 26 Nov 1994 02:48:28 -0600

On 23 Nov 1994 > with Sister Susie the Floozie's help:
> DALLAS VIDEO FEST
> PRENATAL DISCRETION IS ADVISED

Yes, indeed, bretheren and sisteren, I was there. It cost
eight bucks to get in, but I figured it would be worth it to meet the man
who had turned me on to whole new worlds O' wierdness.

So I loaded up the ol' GMC Sodommah with my trusty sidekick, Eric
(who masquerades as a generic video-film student), and my hopefully-soon-
to-be squeeze Amy (a not-so-generic film 'n' video type), and made the
pilgrimage to the big "D".

Suffice it to say that I spent an awful lot of time watching
alarmingly pretentious art videos and incomprehensible foreign stuff,
while my companions nattered endlessly in equally incomprehensible
video jargon to the point that I was ready to pull the fire alarm just
for some RELIEF! But then, at 9:15, the hour of my deliverence arrived.
Or not--the previous lecture was still going on, so we had to
wait until they were done before the Rev could take the stand. I did
manage to talk Amy into attending the lecture, but Eric couldn't tear
himself away from some cyberpunk-thing shot (but not killed,
unfortunately) in Houston, which was probably just as well.
Rev. Stang finally took the podium, and it was well worth the
wait. I won't bore you with details--it's pretty much verbatim in the
notes. I wish I could describe the video playing in the background as he
spoke--it was sorta like Arise!, but a lot more random...

There was a short Q&A session afterwards; most of the
questions were along the lines of "where is the SubGenius radio show?",
with the occaisonal Pink asking "could you explain this Slack business
again?"

The session ended, the great unwashed disbursed, and I made
my way down to the front to meet the MAN. I was nervous as a Mormon in a
brothel, but my anxiety turned out to be unfounded. He was pretty cool, and
became downright friendly upon learning that I had mailed in the $20 and
gotten ordained! Hell, Rev. Suzy even gave me a hug, exclaiming "What a
sweet boy! He gave us money!"

I stuck around long enough to listen to them field some
theological questions from a curious old Pink; at one point, he asked,"So
now that Henry has been ordained, he has Slack, right?" Whereupon Stang replied, "YEs, he's on his way to having Slack, and may achieve it,
unless Dobbs decides to "test" him!"

****


Cleveland Flying Lemur Devival #1
From: cxt18@po.CWRU.Edu (Christina Tait)
Date: 23 Nov 1994 12:24:58 GMT

Get your saggy asses to the most benighted CIA, maybe it's that
CIA, building for the December 2nd Devival at 8:30 PM. Fill your
little tummy with hatred of all things normal, crawl out from
under your parents' couch and come screach with the Rev. and
the whole local directorate of BobCo. Dupe that secret fantasy
lover into joining you in a short duration wedding and then
explore the crusty caverns of depravity in the name of Dobby
Bobbs as the termination of the conspiracy's grip on your essence
becomes a matter of trust. Confuse and frustrate parents and
other authority figures as you fill the holy coffers of Bob's
sacred trousers. Delight in the visage of the one true
slackmaster as your old life burns away and your hate-lust is
quenched in an endless ejaculation of loathing and scorn. Feel
extra-cool as you carefully remove road grime from your
Civic's rear bumper in order to apply the groovy Bob bumper
sticker you drunkenly purchased the night before.

ticket info: call 221-2535
CIA Factory Bldg, 11610 Eulid Ave. Clev. OH.

Praise . . . . . . Bobby

*****
Subject: Cleveland Devival!
From: ljduchez@en.com (Lou Duchez)
Date: 3 Dec 1994 00:58:47 -0500

Well, I just got back from the Cleveland Devival. My best description:
imagine Christmas morning in Whoville with lots of LSD floating around.

In other words: GO! And you Cleveland-area types: there's something
going on Saturday night in Akron, at
Cavanaugh's I think. Should be a bitchin' party.

********

Subject: Cleveland Devival...thanks..
From: sxb40@po.CWRU.Edu (Steven Bevilacqua)
Date: 5 Dec 1994 06:34:35 GMT

The Cleveland devival at Kulas auditorium this past friday was
lofty... and I would like to thank the many people who helped
to make it a tremendous success.

The Association for Consiousness Exploration for providing
the Mind Machines and really helping with advertising, especially
the lovely Princess Wei-R-Doe for all her help and support.

The Mighty Rev. Stang and Dr. Legume for THEIR enlightning rants.
Chas Smith's ESO and Forms of Insanity, who volunteered their
musical stylings.

Anthony and Devil Biker Babe for their help at the door as well
as providing visual entertainment.

Genina Grrinder, for the great job she did in promoting the
SubGenius in various media. And helping at the show.

J.R. "BoB" Dobbs.. You were right J.R. ... there is money
to be made at this thing, special thanks for the sales and promotion advice.
P.S. You dropped your pipe in Akron, I think it was during that Bondage
thing, I have it, and plan on selling it for top price, so buy yourself
another one you cheep bastard. Also, I enjoyed your brain it was tasty.

If you missed this show, you are a loser and should probably
wish a slow and painful death upon yourself, or seek forgiviness
by send a small sacrifical donation to the Church. All sins have
a price.

Finally I would like to mention the Akron show, which likewise
was an excricutiating success, I can personally testify that
becoming a SubG will lead to a life full of rewards both financial
and sexual beyond your wildest dreams. So send in your cash, what
else do you have to spend it on anyway...food, clothing, rent.. HA
, stop thinking of yourself!!! Think only of BoB.
Kill BoB

Steve Bevilacqua
Owner, The Flying Lemur (216)221-2535

****

From: sbjohnston@aol.com (SBJohnston)
Date: 10 Dec 1994 22:30:34 -0500

My First SubGenius Devival --
The Devival at "Revival" - Philadelphia, December 9, 1994

I attended my first Devival last night, and I'd have to give it a big
thumbs-up. I've read the books, alt.slack'd, and done my bit to subvert
my surroundings with Church dogma, but never before had I experienced my
fellow SubGenii in the *Devival* setting.

Held in an old Church, it was a simple show with a complex audience. What
a cross-section of society! I saw street-people, working-men and women,
college students, and even those who have most deeply infiltrated the
Conspiracy: PROFESSIONALS.

All these good folks seem'd to enjoy the excellent ranting by Rev. I.
Stang, Pastor Craig Roll, Dr. K'taden Legume, Papa Joe Mama, and an
Entered Apprentice speaker called Josh. The pulpit shook with the fury of
their flushed-faced, frothing, fantastic, futuristic, fun-filled phantasy
of fun. Particularly memorable for me were Stang's lecture on modern
America society ("The "work" ethic is SATANIC!! Mark "Bob's" words - it
will be our doom!"), and Father Joe Mama's sermon on "Compromise, or
Corruption?"

I enjoyed tossing out an occasional remark supporting or decrying the
words from the stage, but my larynx was a bit sore next morning. I also
introduced myself to Rev Stang, and congratulated him on getting online
and onto USENET's alt.slack. Through the high noise level around the
Sacred Sales Table I believe I heard the good Reverend reply with the
standard laments "Ah, but my AOL bills are so high!" and "where does all
my free time go?"

And of course, let me not forget to mention the 'Hos -- whose tempting,
scantily-clad bodies and sultry manners Pastor Craig used to such good
effect on stage in his Church recruitment pitch ("Don't go, 'hos!") I'm
sure no one missed the message: Join The Church of the SubGenius and ride
with the SexGoddesses in 1998. See? SEX SELLS!

So if you get the chance to attend a Church Devival, I'd say, go for it!
If nothing else, it's a good place to buy your fix of Church regalia and
propaganda merchandise.

Now what am I going to do with a pair of Dobbshead boxers, size Large? We
all know the dangers of underwear that is too tight...

Steve The Reverend Doktor S-bo sbjohnston@aol.com

****

From: SirWill1@omni.voicenet.com (SirWill1)

I had a great time. I'm so fully devived,
I can't tell my penis from my anus and everywhere I go there's always a
parking space. Must be the luck plane tilting in my direction. OK, now
wait a minute, my penis is the convex part and my anus is the concave
part - yeah, that's it -- I think I've got it straight now.

***

Original file name: Reports on Misc.'94 Devivals

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