Where's my stuff?
Correspondent:: Reverend Kenny
Date: Sun, 28 Nov 2004 19:32:16 -0500
--------
From the pictures I've seen, it looks like Stang is partying in Europe
or some junk. I was worried about my "reverendship" order. It's been a
long time since I placed my order online. I haven't been charged yet and
haven't received anything either. IT was getting kinda weird until I
found the pics of Stang over seas... I guess I assumed business went on
as usual even when he was gone. Oh well. It looks like he's having fun
though!
--
Illuminations,
Reverend Kenny
1,000,000 Lemmings can't be wrong!
Correspondent:: "iDRMRSR"
Date: Sun, 28 Nov 2004 19:44:30 -0500
--------
>>It's been a
long time since I placed my order online. I haven't been charged yet and
haven't received anything either.
Well, if that's genuinely true, keep sending $30 until you finally GET
something.
It works like an ELEVATOR. If you want to get the elevator there faster,
you keep PRESSING THE BUTTON.
Once you've made enough $30 payments online, you will eventually be deemed
WORTHY.
This is a religion, after all, not a joke*, and you've got to demonstrate
some kind of commitment and sacrifice, and I might add...UNQUESTIONING
FAITH. Purge yourself of your earthly belongings for the Church, and also
while you are at it purge the earthly belongings of those around you over
whom you have influence (or superior strength).
It's a RELIGION, dammit. It's what we DO.
[*]
-----
*to some people
Correspondent:: Reverend Kenny
Date: Sun, 28 Nov 2004 19:48:14 -0500
--------
You guys are all so brilliant it blinds me! LOL! That was my last $30
and The church wouldn't even take it! I guess I'll go to target and buy
$30 worth of Cheese Nips. Teehee
--
Illuminations,
Reverend Kenny
1,000,000 Lemmings can't be wrong!
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 29 Nov 2004 02:43:14 GMT
--------
In article <7_adnb6B5cdT7DfcRVn-2g@comcast.com>,
Reverend Kenny wrote:
> You guys are all so brilliant it blinds me! LOL! That was my last $30
> and The Church wouldn't even take it!
Now that you've been bent over and robbed by religious bandits, you're
well on your way to real enlightenment.
--
HellPope Huey
People and puppies have one striking similarity:
if you squeeze 'em too hard,
they'll usually piss on you
Everything was vanity and striving after wind.
- Ecclesiastes 2:1-11
"CLICK CLICK BLOODY CLICK PANCAKES!!"
- Stewie Griffin
Correspondent:: rlan538885@aol.comnobozos (RLan538885)
Date: 29 Nov 2004 21:01:49 GMT
--------
Pardon me, Reverend Kenny, but I've been using the tagline, "100,000 lemmings
can't be wrong" since the eighties. Kindly choose a different one, or
I'll...I'll....Damn! Please choose a different tagline.
"100,000 lemmings can't be wrong."
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Mon, 29 Nov 2004 14:57:58 -0800
--------
RLan538885 wrote:
>
> Pardon me, Reverend Kenny, but I've been using the tagline, "100,000 lemmings
> can't be wrong" since the eighties. Kindly choose a different one, or
> I'll...I'll....Damn! Please choose a different tagline.
>
> "100,000 lemmings can't be wrong."
Kiss my ass, RLame, but I have been using the phrase "since the
eighties" since the seventies. Kindly shut up you dumb jerk.
"100,000 lemmings can't be wrong."
Correspondent:: Reverend Kenny
Date: Mon, 29 Nov 2004 20:24:37 -0500
--------
Sorry, it's something that came off my Commodore 64... I miss BBS's and
logging into Compuserve at 2400 baud. I miss the net before the world
wide web.
I'll try to think of something cooler.
nenslo wrote:
> RLan538885 wrote:
>
>>Pardon me, Reverend Kenny, but I've been using the tagline, "100,000 lemmings
>>can't be wrong" since the eighties. Kindly choose a different one, or
>>I'll...I'll....Damn! Please choose a different tagline.
>>
>>"100,000 lemmings can't be wrong."
>
>
> Kiss my ass, RLame, but I have been using the phrase "since the
> eighties" since the seventies. Kindly shut up you dumb jerk.
>
> "100,000 lemmings can't be wrong."
--
Illuminations,
Reverend Kenny
1,000,000 Lemmings can't be wrong!
Correspondent:: "iDRMRSR"
Date: Mon, 29 Nov 2004 20:31:09 -0500
--------
>>I miss the net before the world
wide web.
And I miss the days before PC's when I was able to make a twenty million
dollar computer run nothing but MY FUCKING PROGRAM for hours at a time.
[*]
-----
Correspondent:: HdMrs. Salacia the Overseer
Date: Sun, 28 Nov 2004 18:46:04 -0600
--------
On Sun, 28 Nov 2004 19:32:16 -0500, Reverend Kenny
wrote:
> From the pictures I've seen, it looks like Stang is partying in Europe
>or some junk. I was worried about my "reverendship" order. It's been a
>long time since I placed my order online. I haven't been charged yet and
>haven't received anything either. IT was getting kinda weird until I
>found the pics of Stang over seas... I guess I assumed business went on
>as usual even when he was gone. Oh well. It looks like he's having fun
>though!
Correspondent:: "nu-monet v7.0"
Date: Sun, 28 Nov 2004 18:47:39 -0700
--------
Reverend Kenny wrote:
>
> I was worried about my "reverendship" order.
> It's been a long time since I placed my order
> online. I haven't been charged yet and haven't
> received anything either.
There's been some shuffling of the Holy P.O. Box
and where-to-send-to-to-get-get-stuff-stuff, so
it's prolly just a bollix.
You might try the phone number. Keep at it.
Otherwise, do go for the free dual ULC reverendship
at the same time. And you'll be surprised how many
folks want to be married by a SubGenius Reverend.
For some, it's just not "official" until they've
had a ShortDurMar with a life extention.
Be sure to draw up a "CLERGY" sign for the dash of
you car, too. Might save you a ticket or two.
Wearing "Bob" in public is a blast. I don't do it
as much as I used to--all that free sex takes its
toll.
--
"YOU BELONG TO US NOW!"
"GET DOWN WITH MY SICKNESS!!"
--Kino Beman, brand name
Correspondent:: Reverend Kenny
Date: Sun, 28 Nov 2004 22:00:10 -0500
--------
nu-monet v7.0 wrote:
> Reverend Kenny wrote:
>
>>I was worried about my "reverendship" order.
>>It's been a long time since I placed my order
>>online. I haven't been charged yet and haven't
>>received anything either.
>
>
> There's been some shuffling of the Holy P.O. Box
> and where-to-send-to-to-get-get-stuff-stuff, so
> it's prolly just a bollix.
Uhmmm Online? There are PO Boxes Online?
>
> You might try the phone number. Keep at it.
Why? I'm not worried. The man's in another country, it's not like he's
gonna fly home just to charge my credit card and ship my slack.
>
> Otherwise, do go for the free dual ULC reverendship
> at the same time. And you'll be surprised how many
> folks want to be married by a SubGenius Reverend.
> For some, it's just not "official" until they've
> had a ShortDurMar with a life extention.
I am a REAL minister, I've been doing weddings for a decade now.
>
> Be sure to draw up a "CLERGY" sign for the dash of
> you car, too. Might save you a ticket or two.
Not when you live in the bible belt it doesn't.
>
> Wearing "Bob" in public is a blast. I don't do it
> as much as I used to--all that free sex takes its
> toll.
>
>
Free sex is never actually free... Hell, I got married for it and it
still aint free.
--
Illuminations,
Reverend Kenny
1,000,000 Lemmings can't be wrong!
Correspondent:: phy
Date: Mon, 29 Nov 2004 04:09:53 -0000
--------
Reverend Kenny wrote in
news:npGdnez_IPgmDTfcRVn-hg@comcast.com:
> Free sex is never actually free... Hell, I got married for it and it
> still aint free.
That is the most expensive kind of sex.
-phy
Correspondent:: Zapanaz
Date: Sun, 28 Nov 2004 21:39:34 -0800
--------
On Sun, 28 Nov 2004 19:32:16 -0500, Reverend Kenny
wrote:
> From the pictures I've seen, it looks like Stang is partying in Europe
>or some junk. I was worried about my "reverendship" order. It's been a
>long time since I placed my order online. I haven't been charged yet and
>haven't received anything either. IT was getting kinda weird until I
>found the pics of Stang over seas... I guess I assumed business went on
>as usual even when he was gone. Oh well. It looks like he's having fun
>though!
Remember to send in another 30 bucks every time you invent a new
posting name in order to try to scurry out from everybody's killfiles.
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
I'm going to buy a 3-foot shiny black dildo with chrome racing stripes
and strap it to my forehead. So I can FIT IN.
Correspondent:: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)
Date: 29 Nov 2004 23:09:12 GMT
--------
> From the pictures I've seen, it looks like Stang is partying in Europe
>or some junk. I was worried about my "reverendship" order. It's been a
>long time since I placed my order online. I haven't been charged yet and
>haven't received anything either. IT was getting kinda weird until I
>found the pics of Stang over seas... I guess I assumed business went on
>as usual even when he was gone. Oh well. It looks like he's having fun
>though!
>--
>Illuminations,
>Reverend Kenny
>1,000,000 Lemmings can't be wrong!
>
>
Don't worry, as soon as Stang recovers from his, ahem, "jet lag", he will get
your piddley assed order out to you.
Hey, how do you think he got the money for the trip?
MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man
"War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"
Charles E. Montague
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 29 Nov 2004 23:24:57 GMT
--------
In article <20041129180912.05904.00000798@mb-m19.aol.com>,
mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull) wrote:
> Don't worry, as soon as Stang recovers from his, ahem, "jet lag", he will get
> your piddley assed order out to you.
> Hey, how do you think he got the money for the trip?
Same place as Nu-Monet: the scrap metal buyer, the plasma clinic and
the sperm bank.
--
HellPope Huey
Religion is like dropping sea urchins in your pants
and then trying to convince others
that they should do it too, because its "good."
Oh, SHUT UP.
The best cure for Christianity is reading the Bible.
- Mark Twain
"Smoking and drinking go together,
like porn and nachos."
- "The Oblongs"
Correspondent:: Reverend Kenny
Date: Mon, 29 Nov 2004 20:22:31 -0500
--------
Rev. Richard Skull wrote:
>>From the pictures I've seen, it looks like Stang is partying in Europe
>>or some junk. I was worried about my "reverendship" order. It's been a
>>long time since I placed my order online. I haven't been charged yet and
>>haven't received anything either. IT was getting kinda weird until I
>>found the pics of Stang over seas... I guess I assumed business went on
>>as usual even when he was gone. Oh well. It looks like he's having fun
>>though!
>>--
>>Illuminations,
>>Reverend Kenny
>>1,000,000 Lemmings can't be wrong!
>>
>>
>
>
> Don't worry, as soon as Stang recovers from his, ahem, "jet lag", he will get
> your piddley assed order out to you.
>
> Hey, how do you think he got the money for the trip?
>
>
> MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man
>
> "War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"
>
> Charles E. Montague
I'm not worried at all... I was until I found the pictures. The large
breasted women in most of them made me forget. LOL!
--
Illuminations,
Reverend Kenny
1,000,000 Lemmings can't be wrong!
Correspondent:: polar bear
Date: Mon, 29 Nov 2004 21:42:33 -0800
--------
In article <8rydnTKX_diM8zfcRVn-oA@comcast.com>, Reverend Kenny
wrote:
> From the pictures I've seen, it looks like Stang is partying in Europe
> or some junk. I was worried about my "reverendship" order. It's been a
> long time since I placed my order online. I haven't been charged yet and
> haven't received anything either. IT was getting kinda weird until I
> found the pics of Stang over seas... I guess I assumed business went on
> as usual even when he was gone. Oh well. It looks like he's having fun
> though!
I still have my original ordination package, slightly yellowed with
age, but then that just adds credibility. All you have to do is
scratch my name off the membership card and write in your own.
All yours for only $20 bucks. (the original price)
pb
Correspondent:: asscoassc@aol.comSHUTUP (AssCo Assc)
Date: 30 Nov 2004 16:25:47 GMT
--------
<< All yours for only $20 bucks. (the original price) >>
You should be charging $60.00!
Frozen in the throat
It petrifies the tongue,
Turns mouth into a moat
Shoots arrows through the lung,
Then it contorts intestines -
Guttural rending pain -
Cramps muscles up, and next it
Sclerotifies the brain
-- Copyright 2004 Ilya Shambat
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Tue, 30 Nov 2004 17:42:07 GMT
--------
In article <20041130112547.06367.00000750@mb-m26.aol.com>,
asscoassc@aol.comSHUTUP (AssCo Assc) wrote:
> << All yours for only $20 bucks. (the original price) >>
>
> You should be charging $60.00!
You should be kicked in the pancreas, is what. Its pretty deep in
there, so we're talkin' one hell of a kick. If I don't get to deliver
it, I at least wanna watch.
--
HellPope Huey ~ www.subgenius.com
SubGenius approval is a mercurial thing of suspect merit
and like expecting to get all of your nutritional needs
from just Sugar Frosted Flakes, likely to lead to scurvy.
"Its funny because its poison!"
- "Futurama"
"I am a turkey. Kill me."
- "Addams Family Values"