Attention anybody who knows the answer!

Posted by:: "Wayneth"
Date: 17 Mar 2005 14:26:13 -0800

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I have yet to send in my $30 dollars, and i was wondering how i might
do so exaclty, besides the actual sending of the $30. Do i have to
include anything else, such as a name or credit card number. would it
be possible to send the decapitated head of some unlucky pink as a
replacement for $30, because i worked hard for that $30, and there alot
of ignorant pinks hwom i would enjoy killing.



Posted by:: "iDRMRSR"
Date: Thu, 17 Mar 2005 17:37:41 -0500

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This is a CASH religion.

Maybe it will do you some good to show off your trophies and such, but
that's totally up to you.

If you can get a captive SOUL, Nu-Monet might be interested, though at
present there is a terrible lack of storage space. Of course, I'm speaking
for Nu, which is inappropriate.

And don't just stop at $30. It *IS* the money, after all! The other stuff
is incidental.

[*]
-----




Posted by:: "Rev. Richard Skull"
Date: 17 Mar 2005 15:29:17 -0800

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<
do so exaclty, besides the actual sending of the $30. Do i have to
include anything else, such as a name or credit card number. would it
be possible to send the decapitated head of some unlucky pink as a
replacement for $30, because i worked hard for that $30, and there alot

of ignorant pinks hwom i would enjoy killing>>

Although Stang will accept credit cards (via the CafePress Store), cash
is still king here.

Unlike Lydon Laroush or The 700 Club, we do not keep charging your
credit card every month for the rest of your life.

"Bob" has plenty of money! He only asks for the $30 to pay Stangs lowly
wages and cover shipping costs.

Also do not hesitate! The end times they are a' coming! Get your name
registered in the Book of Slack so that the X-ists can find you come
X-Day.



Posted by:: "Rev. Ivan Stang"
Date: Thu, 17 Mar 2005 22:23:33 -0500

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In article <1111102157.407091.67910@o13g2000cwo.googlegroups.com>, Rev.
Richard Skull wrote:

> < >
> do so exaclty, besides the actual sending of the $30. Do i have to
> include anything else, such as a name or credit card number. would it
> be possible to send the decapitated head of some unlucky pink as a
> replacement for $30, because i worked hard for that $30, and there alot
>
> of ignorant pinks hwom i would enjoy killing>>
>
> Although Stang will accept credit cards (via the CafePress Store), cash
> is still king here.

"via the CafePress store?"

Shit, they ONLY accept credit cards. I take credit cards, paypal, money
orders, cash, did I mention credit cards?

HEADS, we got WAY MORE THAN ENOUGH OF.

>
> Unlike Lydon Laroush or The 700 Club, we do not keep charging your
> credit card every month for the rest of your life.

What do you mean "we," white man?

>
> "Bob" has plenty of money! He only asks for the $30 to pay Stangs lowly
> wages and cover shipping costs.
>
> Also do not hesitate! The end times they are a' coming! Get your name
> registered in the Book of Slack so that the X-ists can find you come
> X-Day.
>

1998 is right around the corner.

--
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc.
(4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected, Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the SubGenius
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com PRABOB


Posted by:: "frater S.O.D.D.I."
Date: 17 Mar 2005 15:40:43 -0800

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You can send me the $30 and I'll make sure "Bob" gets it.



Posted by:: "Paul Casino"
Date: 17 Mar 2005 15:53:45 -0800

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Well...

-We'll need your W-2 forms. You work for US now.

-A sample of your blood, hair, semen, urine, feeces, fingerprints and
brain tissue. You may need to drill a hole in your skull to obtain the
later, but you can't make an omelte without breaking a few eggs,
buck-o.

- Your social security #. Don't ask why.

- Have a bank card? Send that too. DON'T FORGET TO SEND YOUR PIN #,
TOO. You'd be amazed how often people forget that...



Posted by:: "nu-monet v7.0"
Date: Thu, 17 Mar 2005 17:03:07 -0700

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Wayneth wrote:
>
> I have yet to send in my $30 dollars, and i was
> wondering how i might do so exaclty, besides the
> actual sending of the $30.

Well, when you do send in the $30, take the opportunity
to also get some of the swag available through the
Scatalog.

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog.html

There is actually a good reason for this. When you
become a SubGenius Reverend, they send you a big packet
full of goodies, things like lapel pins, bumper stickers,
your all-important Reverend card, but very little that
really GRABS the world out there and SCREAMS INTO ITS
UGLY FACE: *I* AM A SUBGENIUS REVEREND!!! BOW DOWN
BEFORE ME!!! (I also strongly suggest that you go for
the ULC Reverendship at the same time, which is free.)

So if you order, let's say a t-shirt with "Bob" on it,
the wretched heathens will see "Bob" and know that they
must bow down before one of the chosen. Truthfully,
you will almost invariably have somebody go up to you
and say something stupid like "Hey, are you one of those
"Bob" people? Wow!"

Now, you might have to do some prepping. For example,
there is a big demand for Short Duration Marriages
performed by a SubGenius Reverend. A lot of reverents
really want a ShortDurMar, so don't blow them off, just
be ready for the *idea* that somebody might just walk up
to you, and ask you to marry them, loudly, in the middle
of a Starbucks or something.

And the people on the street that like "Bob" can look
like just about anything: Yuppies, bikers, gutter punks,
librarians wearing kinky underwear, teenage girls looking
for risky sexual experiments, irate pumpkin growers, and,
of course, evangelicals who know beyond a shadow of a
doubt that you are goin' ta Hell. The evangelicals don't
really "like" "Bob", but they fear him, which is almost
as good.

After a while, you may find that just a single piece of
"Bob" stuff isn't quite enough, and you may want to be
surrounded by "Bob" 24/7, like some of us. And the
Scatalog is still there.

If you're nervous about sending in the $30 for privacy
reasons, send a money order and use a friend's home as
a return address. I did and it was a waste of time, as
since I've been regularly having sex with SubGenii and
have gone to Amsterdam with them twice. It's hard to be
suspicious of somebody when you've sat across from them
on a sofa, both of you in a drooling stupor for a couple
of hours while you discuss the existentialism of llamas
in the Vondelpark. Really, there were llamas in the
Vondelpark in downtown Amsterdam. I wasn't hallucinating.
The llamas, at least.

Or at least *that* time.

In any event, send in that $30, pronto, and get into The
Book of Life asap. Get yourself some swag and start
reveling in the joy and mystery of joy and mystery.

PRABOB.

--
Be Sure To Visit the 'SubGenius Reverend' Blog:
http://slackoff.blogspot.com/
***********
Herring communicate with each other
via a high-pitched, "raspberry"-like
sound emitted from their anuses.
These noises are not produced by
digestive gases.
-- from 'The New Scientist'