religious persuasion

From: blankx@saintly.com (Rev. Blank X. None)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sun, Jun 30, 2002 1:35 PM

Before I found "Bob" I was an atheist and was raised Catholic (I
actually dabbled in Satanism for a while and still dabble in
Discordianism).

How about you?

GOD // Damnation // Rev. Blank X. None
Discordian // SubGenius // Yetiriaist

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From: "nu-monet v4.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Rev. Blank X. None wrote:
>
> Before I found "Bob" I was an atheist and was
> raised Catholic (I actually dabbled in Satanism
> for a while and still dabble in Discordianism).
>
> How about you?
>

Let me make this easier. Fill in the blanks:

Before I found "Bob" I was a/an _________________

and was raised ________________

(I actually dabbled in _________________

and ___________________, and _____________________

for a while and still dabble in _________________ ).

My parents think/thought that I'm a/an _________________

and most of my friends presume I'm a/an __________________.

(Of course I don't really believe in "Bob".

Secretly I'm kind of a/an _______________________________.)

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From: joecosby@mindspring.com (Joe Cosby)

>
>Let me make this easier. Fill in the blanks:
>
>
>Before I found "Bob" I was a/an __accretion____
>
>and was raised _Kevin Bacon_
>
>(I actually dabbled in _Cows rampage in Norway_
>
>and ____black holes_, and _pkunzip -o <<zip file path>> <<output path>>_
>
>for a while and still dabble in _r/w permissions_ ).
>
>My parents think/thought that I'm a/an _OVER 94,000 DATABASES AND RESOURCES!_
>
>and most of my friends presume I'm a/an __FBI FILES__.
>
>(Of course I don't really believe in "Bob".
>
>Secretly I'm kind of a/an _Criminal Records, Sex Offenders and Bankruptcies?_.)

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

I'm an dyslexic agnostic insomniac. I
stayed up last night wondering if there's a Dog.
- Hywel Jenkins

Sig by Kookie Jar 5.98d http://go.to/generalfrenetics/

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: subspecies23@aol.com (SubSpecies23)

>
>Before I found "Bob" I was a/an Agnostic/Atheist
>
>and was raised Church Of Christ in a mostly Baptist and Pentacostal Holiness
town.
>
>(I actually dabbled in Wicca,
>
>and Hinduism, and Buddhism, and almost
everything except satanism and scientology. I'd like to try Satanism though.
At the moment I'm getting into Discordianism.

>My parents think/thought that I'm a/an Christian.
>
>and most of my friends presume I'm a/an agnostic. Actually I hardly have any
friends, all the friends I do have know I'm a SubGenius. Most of my coworkers
are afraid of me, they seem to think I'm the spawn of Satan.
>
>(Of course I don't really believe in "Bob".
>
>Secretly I'm kind of a/an fill-in-the-blank.)
>

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: blankx@saintly.com (Rev. Blank X. None)

Satanism isn't that great, at least the Church of Satan form. They
don't have much of a sense of humor at all and they are quite
authoritarian. On the other hand, I found the other "Satanist" groups
to be too embarrassing to make up for their sense of humor.

GOD // Damnation // Rev. Blank X. None
Discordian // SubGenius // Yetiriaist

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Her Ladyship Lilith von Fraumench <lilith@ZubJenius.com>

In article <1a575725.0206300935.13d023f4@posting.google.com>, Rev.
Blank X. None <blankx@saintly.com> wrote:

> Before I found "Bob" I was an atheist and was raised Catholic (I
> actually dabbled in Satanism for a while and still dabble in
> Discordianism).

Assembly Of God. Went from there directly into SubGenius, and BOY was I
glad to see the bullshit being told with less than a perfectly straight
face.

Her Ladyship Lilith

--
--=8=-- \m/ --=8=-- http://lilith.foolspress.com/ --=8=-- \m/ --=8=--
You'll say that the 50's isn't the present, but we'll have to differ on
that. -- RLan538885 in 20020617153210.12229.00001550@mb-fe.aol.com

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: phy <phy00x@yahoo.com>

blankx@saintly.com (Rev. Blank X. None) wrote in
news:1a575725.0206300935.13d023f4@posting.google.com:

> Before I found "Bob" I was an atheist and was raised Catholic (I
> actually dabbled in Satanism for a while and still dabble in
> Discordianism).
>
> How about you?
>

Down in Alabama, if you aren't Christian, you are either an atheist or a
devil worshipper. I realized my priest's religion was full of shit when I
was about 13 and he insisted only Catholics could get to heaven. Mostly I
just try to follow the golden rule. And pick up slack when I can.

-phy

BTL- Better Than Life

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Magdalen" <magdalen@subgenius.com>

"Rev. Blank X. None" <blankx@saintly.com> wrote in message
news:1a575725.0206300935.13d023f4@posting.google.com...
> Before I found "Bob" I was an atheist and was raised Catholic (I
> actually dabbled in Satanism for a while and still dabble in
> Discordianism).
>
> How about you?

I was raised an atheist. My parents gave up Catholicism when the Vietnam
war happened because they felt that no God could allow such atrocities to
happen. I dabbled in Wicca for a while but never got into Satanism because
my literary studies revealed that the Devil screws everyone who ever makes a
deal with him. There's a whole genre of Devil-screwing-people literature.
Now I believe in reincarnation and that there is an Elder Being from whom we
are all descended and whom we will someday come to resemble, after millions
of years of reincarnational education. I believe that It does not interfere
with Earth because to It, everything that happens here is an illusion.

>
> GOD // Damnation // Rev. Blank X. None
> Discordian // SubGenius // Yetiriaist

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: mshotz@aol.comnospam (James T. Rex King of the Monsters)

>I was raised an atheist. My parents gave up Catholicism when the Vietnam
>war happened because they felt that no God could allow such atrocities to
>happen.

What do you mean Allow? Who do you think was behind the Crusades?

>I dabbled in Wicca for a while but never got into Satanism because
>my literary studies revealed that the Devil screws everyone who ever makes a
>deal with him.

OH! Kinda like a stickbroker!

MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man

"Just think, the next time I shoot someone I could get arrested!"

Lt. Frank Drebin, "The Naked Gun"

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Alliekatt" <alleykatzen@hotmail.com>

How do you dabble in discordianism?

Is that like waking up gay or pretending that you're Hunter S Thompson when
all you end up doing is beating off in a thong and getting drunk on Mickeys
bigmouths?

I dreamt I sold my soul to Satan a few nights ago. In return I got the
power of psychokinesis, right, and in the dream it was REALLY COOL and I
could MOVE SHIT with my MIND! As a matter of fact, it was SO cool that I
started knocking shit off of the mantel and the shelves, just by waggling my
finger and thinking at it, and all I wanted to do was throw shit off of
shelves and watch it fall to the floor, and Satan was like, "don't you want
to do anything else with your powers", and I was like, "No dude, this is TOO
FUCKING COOL!" and he slapped his forehead and left disgustedly while I
creamed myself knocking shit off of shelves and cackling like a looney tune.

alliekatt

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From: "nu-monet v4.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Alliekatt wrote:
>
> "Rev. Blank X. None" worte:
> .
> > Before I found "Bob" I was an atheist and was
> > raised Catholic (I actually dabbled in Satanism
> > for a while and still dabble in Discordianism).
>
> How do you dabble in discordianism?
>

Easy, by dabbling in discordians!

Nyuk, nyuk!

You know you're hot when the discordians laugh
so hard that milk comes out their ears.

At least you hope that's milk!

(rimshot)

But seriously, last night I shot a discordian
in my pajamas. With a gun! Haw!

--
"If you're too old to set a bad example,
the least you can do is to dispense advice."
-- nu-monet

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: blankx@saintly.com (Rev. Blank X. None)

"nu-monet v4.0" <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote in message news:<3D1F7141.7193@succeeds.com>...
> Alliekatt wrote:

> But seriously, last night I shot a discordian
> in my pajamas. With a gun! Haw!

What was a Discordian doing in your pajamas? This wasn't some
therapeutic self-loathing thing was it?

GOD // Damnation // Rev. Blank X. None
Discordian // SubGenius // Yetiriaist

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: blankx@saintly.com (Rev. Blank X. None)

"Alliekatt" <alleykatzen@hotmail.com> wrote in message news:<WHJT8.15101$ry2.8672@nwrddc02.gnilink.net>...

> Is that like waking up gay or pretending that you're Hunter S Thompson when
> all you end up doing is beating off in a thong and getting drunk on Mickeys
> bigmouths?

I spend a lot of time looking for fives.

GOD // Damnation // Rev. Blank X. None
Discordian // SubGenius // Yetiriaist

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Paul E. Jamison" <pauljmsn@infi.net>

Rev. Blank X. None wrote:

> Before I found "Bob" I was an atheist and was raised Catholic (I
> actually dabbled in Satanism for a while and still dabble in
> Discordianism).
>
> How about you?
>

I was raised Babtist, which kinda covers everything you just said.

Paul E. Jamison

"There's more pressure on a vet to get it right.
People say 'It was God's will' when Granny dies,
but they get *angry* when they lose a cow."
- Terry Pratchett

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Ellis Dee" <fxtrt22@yahoo.com>

"Rev. Blank X. None" <blankx@saintly.com> wrote in message

> Before I found "Bob" I was an atheist and was raised Catholic
> How about you?
>
Raised Roman Catholic, switched to Episcopalian (Catholicism lite, without
all that fattening Papal Bull)

Now attempting a Sub-G/Anglican synthesis:

http://www.geocities.com/fxtrt22/Anglicansforbob.html

Web site and belief system are under development.

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From: joecosby@mindspring.com (Joe Cosby)

blankx@saintly.com (Rev. Blank X. None) hunched over a computer,
typing feverishly;
thunder crashed, blankx@saintly.com (Rev. Blank X. None) laughed
madly, then wrote:

>Before I found "Bob" I was an atheist and was raised Catholic (I
>actually dabbled in Satanism for a while and still dabble in
>Discordianism).
>
>How about you?
>
>GOD // Damnation // Rev. Blank X. None
>Discordian // SubGenius // Yetiriaist

I'm an assassin, then and now. "Nothing is true, everything is
permitted".

I'm also a Gnostic, an Hermeticist, a Taoist, a Zen Buddhist,
Rosicrucian, Voodoo high Priest and spare drummer, Witch, Warlock,
Fairy Godfather, several flavors of Pagan, and anything else I think
might get me laid.

I was raised atheist, but that never got me laid.

But my heart belongs to "Bob".

But FUCK THE ACCORDIANS! They never get laid. They wouldn't even
know what getting laid is if RAW didn't have the Playboy Key Card.

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

"Beauty is truth, truth beauty,o/oo~that is all
Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.

A thing of beauty is a joy for ever: --
John Keats

Sig by Kookie Jar 5.98d http://go.to/generalfrenetics/

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Pope Pie $Si Lehrman$" <henlaojim@yahoo.com>

> But FUCK THE ACCORDIANS! They never get laid. They wouldn't even
> know what getting laid is if RAW didn't have the Playboy Key Card.
>
> --
> Joe Cosby
> http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com
>

Joe, you are misguided young lad. You can't do that to accordion, they
don't allow it. Well, maybe some of the pricier electrified Stradella
types, but certainly not the good old steel reed and button board type. I
once knew a concertina that would do some odd things, but you are in for a
great disappointment if you think that the average squeeze box will
participate in anything along the lines you suggest.

--
"I Am that I Am and that's all that I Am,"
says Pope Pie (Si Lehrman).

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Original file name: religious persuasion.txt - converted on Friday, 13 June 2003, 22:39